


Flight #923

by WigletsMom



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Ahch-To, Airplane Crashes, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Ambiguous/Open Ending, Angst, Anxiety, Atmospheric, Demonic Possession, Desert Island, Doggy Style, Dubious Consent, Eventual Smut, F/M, Fear, Fluff and Smut, Gaslighting, Horror, Inappropriate Use of the Force, Lawyer Ben Solo, POV First Person, Past Lives, Psychological Horror, Reylo - Freeform, Sith Temple, Stranded, Survival, Survival Horror, Time Loop, Unreliable Narrator, Unsafe Sex, lovers in paradise, stranded in paradise, there will be smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-11
Updated: 2020-10-24
Packaged: 2021-03-06 11:41:52
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 26,951
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25848994
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WigletsMom/pseuds/WigletsMom
Summary: It was supposed to be the trip of a lifetime: a destination wedding at a tropical island, paid for by the bride and groom. En route to the island, the plane goes down over tropical waters with only a handful of survivors. Rey and Ben wash up on a deserted island, totally alone . . . or are they?A Reylo survival horror story with time loops!Complete.
Relationships: Armitage Hux/Rose Tico, Kylo Ren/Rey, Rey/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren
Comments: 102
Kudos: 130





	1. Down, down, down

Chapter 1 - Down, down, down

Rose is talking to me and I have no idea what she’s saying. I have this really bad habit of tuning people out when I get bored. It always used to bite me in the ass back in high school. You know that feeling of panic and confusion when a teacher calls on you to answer a question and you have no idea what they even asked? That’s me, right now.

I quickly close the brochure for Ahch-To island - our destination - and look at Rose with an apologetic smile. “Sorry, Rosie. I got distracted by the amazing photos in here. What were you saying?”

She points toward the gate where people are lining up. “They are getting ready to start boarding the first class seats.” 

We stand up and gather our carry on bags. There’s a slight tremor in my hand that I try to disguise from Rose. I haven’t told Rose this, but I am terrified of flying. I’ve never actually been on an airplane. I know, statistically speaking, that air travel is very safe. But, statistically speaking, everything goes wrong for me. Well, maybe I’m being a tad dramatic. _Most_ things seem to go wrong for me. As you can see, I have a flare for the dramatic with a solid streak of fatalism.

I’m a twenty-seven year old, single, tall, thin, brown haired, hazel-eyed, lonely sad lonely woman. Did I mention lonely? Rose is my only friend in the world and she’s about to get married. I’m trying to be legitimately happy but I feel like I’m about to lose my best and only friend. It doesn’t help that the guy she’s marrying is someone she just met four months ago. I’ve only met him once. He seems nice enough, I guess. I just don’t see the reason to rush into anything. He has more money than anyone I’ve ever met in my life. He’s personally paying for the entire wedding party to fly out to Ahch-To for the week. How could I refuse? This is going to be the vacation of a lifetime. I could never afford to fly to Ahch-To by myself. 

I don’t want you to think I’m a total loser who doesn’t ever date or get laid or do fun things. I go out on occasion. Last year I had several very nice dates with a guy I met online . . . who eventually ghosted me. I can certainly get laid if I wanted to. I just haven’t wanted to in a while. I’ve been spending a lot of time lately focusing on my business. 

I own an antique store. It’s this quirky little store in the art district of Chandrila. I live in the apartment directly above it. It’s the one good thing I have going in my life, other than my friendship with Rose. My store is actually successful. I have regular customers. I can pay my bills. I’m a responsible adult. I’m really fucking boring and I really fucking need to get laid on this vacation.

“Where are the guys at?” Rose is glancing around the waiting area with a worried look on her face. My job as Maid of Honor is to keep her happy and relaxed until two nights from now when she will be married on the beach at sunset. After that, she is Hux’s problem. 

“Let me worry about that.” I whip out my phone and notice a text from Hux from fifteen minutes ago. Oops. “Hux texted. Ben had a flat tire and they are running late. They are going through security now.” I’ve never met Ben, but Rose talks about him all the time. Apparently he’s a gorgeous single lawyer with a killer body. I suspect she’s trying to hook us up, which is fine with me if he’s actually as hot as she says. He’s the Best Man. I’m the Maid of Honor. People sort of expect that, right? We’ll just have to wait and see.

A few minutes later, I spy Hux making his way through the crowd. Following behind him is . . .  _ hello...  _ an absolutely gorgeous man. Ben Solo is well over six feet tall with broad shoulders. He has longish dark wavy hair and pale skin dotted with beauty marks. He’s looking down typing something furiously on his phone. I briefly imagine those fingers running over my body instead of that stupid cellphone. If he bothered to look up at me, I might actually attempt flirting. As it is, he is otherwise occupied. Rose briefly makes introductions and Ben still doesn’t look up from his phone. He merely nods in my direction.

My anxiety is slowly decreasing. If Rose is happy, I can be happy too. Crisis averted, for now anyway. Two minutes later, the flight attendant is making an announcement for first class passengers to begin boarding. Hux reaches to grab Rose’s carry on bag. How disgustingly cute. Maybe someday someone will want to carry things for me.

We are silently shuffling down the jetway single file, waiting to board the plane and find our seats when someone steps on the back of my flip-flops causing me to stumble. I make one of those embarrassing noises similar to “Woaahhahahh!” I can’t be sure exactly what comes out of my mouth. Let’s just assume it is something regrettable and ineloquent. I land on my hands and knees and the skirt of my pale yellow sundress flies up revealing my hot pink underwear. Awesome.

Tears begin to fill my eyes and I quickly smooth down my skirt.  _ Do not cry _ . I feel a firm grip on both biceps and I am pulled up into a standing position, as if I weighed nothing at all. I find myself staring into the warm brown eyes of Ben Solo. Warm, chocolatey brown. Mmm.

“Are you OK?” He asks, giving me the once over. I nod and he seems satisfied. 

“At least I was wearing underwear!” I exclaim. I immediately regret saying it as soon as I see the awkward look on his face. Oh well, there goes my chances of getting to hook up with the Best Man this week. I’m keeping a stupid smile plastered on my face. I think it will keep me from crying or dying of embarrassment. I hope.

“Right. Umm, we should get going.” Lawyers are always so practical. At this point all the other first class passengers have passed us. The bitch who stepped on my flip flop didn’t even apologize or try to help me up. Ben reaches down and grabs my carry on bag and starts off again down the jetway. I scurry to keep up. 

As the passengers board the plane, we are greeted by Captain Dameron. He flashes me a wide toothy grin, welcomes me on board and I feel myself blushing. I briefly imagine myself fisting my fingers in those curly locks in a moment of passion. Good looking people everywhere today. He has a baby face though. He can’t possibly be much older than I am.

“He doesn’t look old enough to be flying a plane.” I mutter, mostly to myself. I can see the beginning of a smile on the lips of Ben Solo. 

“This is a Corellian YT-1300f, they practically fly themselves.” Ben deposits my carry on bag into the overhead compartment above his seat as we reach the first class cabin. I thank him and glance up, looking for my seat. I’m supposed to be in 3A. Rose had gotten me a window seat because she claims the view will keep me from getting bored during our six hour flight. Rose is across the aisle in 3C and Hux is in 3D.

I turn to glance at seat 3B, which is now occupied by Ben Solo. Six hours of conversation with someone who just saw my hot pink undies. What could go wrong?

I scoot past him and sit in my seat, immediately buckling my belt and pulling it tight. I clutch both armrests and begin a nice calming meditation in my head. I imagine myself sitting on the black sandy beach of Ahch-to. The waves are rolling in. A light breeze gently flows through my hair. A muscular man in tight white shorts is handing me a drink. The plane is going to crash!!!!!!!!!!! Shit, no. I’m on the beach, the waves are rolling in. I’m sipping a tropical cocktail. The plane is going to crash!!!!!!!! When is this stupid plane going to get in the air? I nervously glance to my right and see that Hux and Rose are holding hands and staring into each other’s eyes. No help there. I need to distract myself. I should have brought drugs. Why didn’t I think of that? All I packed was a giant bottle of Pepto. A valium would be really awesome right now. As soon as the flight attendants start serving booze I am definitely getting a drink. 

I inspect the pocket of the seat back in front of me. Inside is a little map of the plane with the emergency exits labeled and instructions for evacuation. My seat cushion can float, which is good because I swim like a rock. I memorize every fucking detail like my life depends on it. Statistically speaking, airplanes are very safe (I know I keep saying this, but it’s true). I’m still reading the shit out of this pamphlet, just in case. I also quickly flip through the Skymall magazine and locate the barf bag.

The twenty minutes that it takes to get the other passengers on board and in their seats is agonizing. My anxiety builds and builds until I can no longer contain it within my body. I begin lightly tapping my fingernails on the armrests in an agitated manner.

“Dude, you are freaking me out.” Ben says, reaching over to put his hand on top of mine. I think he’s only doing it so I will stop fidgeting. I look over at him. I can’t read his expression. I’ve never been good at recognizing other people’s emotions. If I had to guess, I would say he thinks I’m nuts.

“I’ve never actually been on an airplane before.” I admit. “I’m not usually this neurotic.”

“Oh. Well, it’s not that bad. Once we get in the air, you’ll be fine. You know, statistically speaking, airplanes are very safe. It’s much safer than riding in a car or the subway.” 

I laugh and then whisper, “Yes, I know.” 

He keeps his hand on top of mine while the plane taxis on the runway. The actual takeoff is not as bad as I imagined. Rose had been right, the window seat gave me something to focus on. Watching the Chandrila International Airport shrink and disappear as we soared into the clouds was fascinating. Ben lets go of my hand once the Captain removes the seat belt indicator and announces that we have reached our cruising altitude. Only five and a half hours to go until we land in paradise. Maybe I can take a nap. The in flight movie is some horrible romantic comedy that Rose and I have watched on Netflix half a dozen times. I don’t need to see it again.

A flight attendant appears a few minutes later to take our drink orders. “We are going to need two whiskeys please.” Ben glances at me briefly before turning back to the flight attendant, “Make hers a double.” 

\---

I am jolted awake by a woman’s scream in the cabin. For a minute I forget where I am. I’m too confused to be afraid. I look over to Ben and he looks worried. He’s quickly buckling his seat belt and I do the same. I lift the window shade and see the thunderstorm outside. The lightning is close. Far too close. Turbulence rocks the plane and we bounce in our seats. For one horrible second the plane drops and my stomach feels like it's been sucked out of my body. Even the seasoned fliers look uncomfortable. The flight attendants are ordered by the captain to return to their seats.

  
I begin a mantra. “The plane is not going to crash. The plane is not going to crash. The plane is not going to crash.” I think I’m saying it in my head but I must have said it outloud because Ben looks horrified. He grabs my face, his large hands cupping each side.

“Look at me.” He commands, and for some reason I obey. His eyes are wide and shiny. He is afraid. “Nothing bad is going to happen. You are safe. The plane is safe. It’s just a storm.” 

As soon as he says the words, a bolt of lightning strikes one of the engines. Alarms begin to sound and the turbulence is so bad that people are vomiting and screaming and crying. 

The plane begins to plummet. It feels like that first big drop on a wooden roller coaster. Down, down, down. I hate to cry, it always feels like such a weakness, but now I let the tears flow unabashedly down my cheeks. The oxygen masks drop from the ceiling. Ben reaches over and pulls a mask over my face, tightening the straps. He secures his own mask then takes my hand again, intertwining our fingers. His grip is painfully tight, but I will allow it. At least I won’t die alone.

There is a horrible screeching noise. Metal on metal. It sounds like the plane itself is screaming out in pain. Something is burning and smoke is filling the cabin. The plane is ripping apart. I watch in horror as a large piece of the first class cabin roof rips away, taking several rows of seats with it. The wind whips my hair and the rain in my face blinds me. I squeeze my eyes shut and brace myself for pain. I’m sure it hurts to die. I hope it’s quick. 

I open my eyes and turn to Ben. The last thing I remember is looking into Ben Solo’s eyes. His oxygen mask is gone. The wind must have pulled it off of him. He smiles at me, his eyes full of unshed tears. I squeeze his hand and he squeezes back. Then there was darkness.

\---

This time, I awaken to the sound of waves crashing on a beach. Pain shoots down my right leg. I slowly open my eyes and find myself staring up at a starry sky. Are there this many stars over Chandrila? I laugh. Of course there are. It’s the same amount of stars, just easier to see without the bright lights of the city obscuring them.

I’m soaking wet and laying on my back in sand. My arms and legs are spread out like a starfish. My head hurts, like the worst hangover I’ve ever had in my life. I’m afraid to move. I’m sure every bone in my body must be broken. I lay there for a while, wiggling various parts of my body before deciding I’m not that badly hurt. I’m careful not to move my right leg, which is either broken or sprained. I think it’s my knee. 

I slowly lift myself into a sitting position and look around. I’m on the beach at the waterline. I can see various pieces of luggage and airplane debris floating all around. I don’t see any other passengers. No dead bodies are floating in the water, thank the gods.

“Hello?” I scream out into the night. I don’t hear anything in reply. I scream for several more minutes before giving up and collapsing back into the sand with a sob.

I only know two things for certain. The plane has crashed and I am alone.


	2. Chapter 2 - Day 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have so many crazy ideas for this story. It's going to get wild.   
> :)

Chapter 2 - Day 1

I must have managed to fall asleep. As I gradually awaken, I can feel the warmth of the tropical sun on my skin. I’m not wearing sunscreen and I usually turn red like a lobster after any time spent in the sun. I should get up and find some shade. I can already tell I’ve been here for a while because my clothes have dried out. It must be low tide. I open my eyes and find myself staring at the face of Ben Solo. It startles me and I scream. He also screams (but in a manly sort of way) and falls backward in the sand.

“Sorry to scare you.” He mutters, brushing sand off his legs as he stands. He offers me his hand, which I take. As he pulls me into a standing position, I gasp and reach for my right leg before collapsing into the sand.

“Oh crap.” I mutter. “Something is definitely wrong with my right knee.” He pulls me up again and I almost collapse into him from the pain but Ben wraps an arm around my waist and steadies me. 

“Let’s move up to the shade and I'll take a look at your knee.” We hobble about twenty feet up to a shady spot under some lush tropical trees. It feels about twenty degrees cooler up here, and I am grateful for the tropical breeze.

He begins a delicate prodding around my knee cap before bending my leg. I hiss in pain when he straightens my leg out. “I have absolutely zero medical knowledge, but I think you have sprained your knee.” He looks up into my eyes for confirmation. 

“I think you’re right. I sprained this knee once back in high school. It feels like it did back then. I’ll be OK if I just wrap it tightly with something.” I smile at him and then my eyes drift down to his left bicep which looks like a velociraptor has clawed him. “Holy shit, your arm!” I can’t believe I didn’t notice it sooner. Guilt washes over me. I am so selfish sometimes. 

He shifts slightly, as if trying to hide the wound from me. “It’s not that bad, really. Just a few scratches.” 

I spring forward and pry apart the sleeve of his button down shirt, which had been shredded. There are three deep gashes cutting across his bicep. The bleeding has stopped and I don’t think he needs stitches, not that we have medical supplies for stitches. How is he not in total agony right now? Just looking at his arm makes me want to vomit and/or pass out. Suddenly my knee seems so trivial.

“I think we should rinse it off in the salt water and bandage it. I remember reading somewhere that salt water helps with wounds. Prevents infections or something? Maybe we can find something to wrap it with in one of the suitcases?” I stand up and start hobbling back toward the beach. Ben grabs my arm and spins me around.

“You sit here. I will bring the suitcases up here into the shade.” He points to my knee. “I don’t want you walking around until we wrap your knee.” 

I open my mouth to protest but decide against it. As Ben turns and walks back to the beach, I sink back into the sand and look up at the sky. I notice that I’m sitting under a banana tree. At least we won’t starve to death. . . for a while anyway. 

Ben manages to find six suitcases and two large pieces of metal from the plane. He drags everything up to our makeshift camp under the banana trees. “I figure these might come in handy if we have to build a shelter.” A shelter?  _ Oh shit _ . How long does he think we are going to be here? Surely someone is looking for us already. The second the plane disappeared off radar, someone would have begun a search, right? I’m afraid to discuss it with Ben. 

We start looking through the suitcases for useful items. We don’t find any medicine or bandages. Seriously, doesn’t anybody have any God damn advil? I find a bandanna in one that I wrap around Ben's arm. He clenches his jaw as I tighten it but he doesn’t complain. I don’t know what to do if his arm gets infected. I push that thought aside for now. 

Ben rips someone’s t-shirt into strips and begins winding it around my knee. His hands are very gentle. I can tell he’s worried about tying it too tight or hurting me. It’s cute. He’s going to make a good father someday. Ugh, where did that thought come from?

“Did you find any bodies on the beach?” I ask quietly. He pauses wrapping my knee but doesn’t look up. He shakes his head as he continues wrapping. “Do -” I hesitate, not really want an answer to my questions, “Do you think we are the only ones alive?” 

“No. I think there are probably other survivors. I’m sure there are. We should probably explore the island, find some food and see if there is any fresh water. Maybe the others are further down the beach or on one of the other islands.” He finishes tying the wrapping on my knee and then sits back a little bit. 

“Other islands?” I look into Ben’s eyes. 

“Yeah, when I was on the beach I could see at least a half a dozen other small islands within swimming distance and one large one with a volcano. If I’m correct then we are somewhere in the Naberrie Islands, about an hour flight south of Ahch-To.”

My heart sinks at his revelation. The Naberrie Islands. A large chain of volcanic islands stretching over several hundred miles. There were about three hundred islands of varying sizes in the chain and none of them were inhabited due to frequent volcanic eruptions. If Ben is correct and we are in the Naberrie Island chain, then it could be a long time before any searchers find us. 

I must have a look of terror on my face because he starts trying to reassure me that everything will be OK. I’m not even listening. I feel myself fall into a tailspin of anxiety. We are trapped. We might be alone. We might not have any fresh water. We have no medical supplies. What if Rose is dead? I don’t know how to swim! Where will I poop? I don’t know how to build a fire! What if-

“..Ok?” He’s in my face now, tipping up my chin so that I look up into his eyes. I missed whatever he said, but I nod slowly anyway. He smiles at me and then stands, reaching out his good arm to help me up. “First, let's try and find some water.” 

Ok. Solid plan. Water. I can do this.

***

We wander through the middle of our small (very fucking small) island gathering anything of use. We do not find a magical source of fresh water but we do find a ton of coconut trees. Ben assures me that he can get them open and the coconut water should keep us alive. We don’t have any tools so I wonder how he’s going to get these things open? Maybe we can bash them with a rock or something. We make several trips back to our starting point with armloads of coconuts. 

On our third trip back for coconuts, we wander a little farther into the center of the island. We’ve been going slow because of my knee and his arm. I worry that he’s getting frustrated with my slow progress, even though he doesn’t say anything. 

He’s gotten a few steps ahead of me and even though this is a small island, I am terrified that he will disappear into the foliage never to be seen again. “Ben! Can we um…. I have to pee.” 

He stops and turns back, examining me with a blank look. He nods and stares off in the opposite direction.

“Ok then, I’m going over this way. Don’t peek.” I hobble deeper into the jungle searching for a safe place to squat. I make sure the area is snake and spider free before squatting to quickly pee. It’s tricky with my knee being bandaged, but I manage not to get it all over myself. As I stand up and pull up my hot pink undies, I notice a stone structure ahead of me. I take a few hesitant steps forward. 

“Hey Ben! Come here, I found something!” I inch closer to the structure. It looks like a stone altar surrounded in a circle by round pillars of stone. It kind of reminds me of Stonehenge or something out of this video game I used to be obsessed with called Skyrim. It’s obviously been here for a while. The stones are cracked and worn, covered in various jungle vines and moss. I stop just outside of it. Something is telling me not to enter the circle. It’s probably just my anxiety.

Ben emerges from the jungle and stops when he sees the structure. His eyes widen as he takes it all in. He slowly walks toward the altar. I grab his hand and hold him back.

“Wait. I’ve got a bad feeling about this.” 

He gives my hand a reassuring squeeze. “It’s Ok. This place has been abandoned for probably a thousand years. Let’s check it out.” He pulls me forward and we step into the stone circle.

As soon as both of my feet hit the stone inside the circle, I am blinded by a flash of light. I look over to the altar and my mouth is frozen in a silent scream. A naked woman lays on the altar, her arms and legs tied. There are strange symbols painted all over her body. She is thrashing around in terror. Above her is a figure cloaked in black robes. His face is obscured by a hood. He holds a long jagged dagger with a red blade. It almost looks like it’s glowing. He raises the dagger high above his head and then swings downward to plunge the blade into the woman’s chest. Her body spasms and then goes still, her head falling to the side. I look at her face. I look at her face and recognize my own.

I scream. Ben is standing in front of me, shaking me. “Rey? What’s wrong?”

“The people. Did you see it? Over there.” I point to the altar. He gives me a strange look and doesn’t answer. He didn’t see it?  _ He didn’t see it _ . He looks over to where I am pointing.

“What’s that?” He lets go of my shoulders and walks over to the altar. Sitting on the stone is the dagger. He reaches down to grab it.

  
  
“No!” I cry. Something is wrong here. Something is very very wrong here. We need to get away from here. Now.

“Rey, this dagger might come in handy. I could use it for the coconuts or to scale fish or something. We don’t have any other tools.” He grabs the dagger and holds it up in front of his face, examining the blade. A chill runs down my spine.

“I think we should leave it.” I whisper. I’m trembling now and I can’t stop myself.

“We might need it. Come on, let’s get back and try and get a fire going and get these coconuts open.” He tucks the dagger into his belt and extends a hand to me. 

As we make our way back to the beach, I am too distracted to notice that my knee no longer hurts.

***

It takes us almost two hours to build a fire. Apparently neither of us are skilled survivalists. Ben blames the humidity and the fact that it was damn near impossible to find any dry firewood because of last night’s storm. We huddle around our pathetically small flames and Ben uses the dagger to try and saw open a coconut. 

“Aha!” He cries in triumph as he manages to get one open. He takes a swig before passing it over to me. I take a big gulp of the refreshing liquid and feel my spirits lifting. Ok. Maybe we won’t die out here after all. We have fire, we have water, we have shelter. Ben arranged the two pieces of metal into a little shelter to protect us from rain.

My knee feels amazing right now. I slowly unwrap the strips of cloth and look at it. Not a single bruise anywhere to be seen. Hmm. I bend and flex and feel no pain or discomfort.

I look up at Ben, “I should change the bandage on your arm. Come sit over here.” He sits down next to me and I pass the coconut back to him. I unwind the bandages slowly. “How does it feel?” 

“Really good actually. I think the salt water helped.” He takes a sip of coconut water and smiles at me.

I pull away the bandage to examine the wound. It’s gone. The skin is perfect and unblemished. There are no marks or scars. Nothing to indicate that he had ever been injured. 

“Ben,” I whisper. He glances at his arm and jerks away from me, scrambling to stand up. 

“What the fuck?” He runs his fingers over his bicep, poking, squeezing. His panicked eyes find mine. “What the fuck?” He asks again.

“My knee is better too.” I say quietly. “Something is wrong with this island.”


	3. Chapter 3 -  Night 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for all the comments and kudos. I keep slipping into past tense, so if you notice any mistakes, that's my bad. I am my own editor. ;)  
> The movie ranking listed is my husband's, an episode 8 hater. Enjoy and thank you for reading!

Chapter 3 - Night 1

  


Ben doesn’t talk to me for most of the late afternoon and early evening. He’s really freaked out about his arm, I can tell. I don’t know what to say to comfort him. I’m fucking scared too. I don’t tell him the details of the vision - hallucination? - that I saw. I don’t want to push him over the edge. So far he seems to be the more stable of our little pair. At any given moment I’m dangling over the edge of insanity. No use bringing him along with me.

  


He sits by himself in the shade fashioning a stick into a spear. He uses the sharp dagger blade to carve the spear’s tip. After he finishes, he strips off his shirt and shoes and walks out into the water up to his waist and starts trying to stab fish. I watch him for a while, perched under my little shady banana tree, hopeful. Some protein would be nice. If all we eat is fruit, I’m going to tire out quickly.

  


He lets out a manly roar and stabs at the water furiously. His spear comes up with a fish attached to the end.  _ Oh shit. _ I squeal in surprise and clap my hands together, running to the shoreline to congratulate him. He has this stupid expression on his face, half pride, half disbelief. He’s soaking wet and he scoops me into a hug, spinning me around on the beach. My dress gets all wet again, but I don’t mind. We’re eating good tonight.

  


He uses the dagger to take the scales off the fish and then we mount it on a stick over the fire. I turn it occasionally. It’s not ideal, but it will get the job done. 

  


Ben is in a much better mood after his little fishing expedition. It must be some genetic hangover from caveman days that makes a man feel good after hunting. I’m not about to make any judgments, I’m eating fish and it is infinitely better than the bananas we had for lunch. 

  


After eating, we sit side by side next to the fire, watching the sun set. It would be paradise in any other circumstance. The temperature drops quickly once the sun dips below the horizon. The tropical breeze makes it quite chilly on the beach. We start digging through the suitcases to find more suitable attire. I find a sweater that I put on over my dress. None of the women’s pants will fit me. Ben finds a button-down Hawaiian shirt to replace his ripped one. 

  


Just before we turn in for the night, Ben stands up suddenly and points to a spot on the horizon. “Look! A fire!” I follow the line of his finger to a tiny orange dot that is unmistakably a small bonfire. We begin scanning the horizon and spot three more little fires on other beaches. The large island with the volcano seems to have the biggest bonfire. Ben scoops me up into a hug, crushing his face into my neck. They have to be the other survivors. We are not alone!

  


He puts me back down on my feet and for a second I think he might kiss me. He doesn’t. I pack away my disappointment to examine in detail at some future time when I’m not trying to survive on a scary island. I’m not looking forward to sleeping on this island at all. Especially not after the vision or whatever it was that I saw earlier. 

  


As it turns out, Ben is not ready to sleep yet either. We sit by the fire a bit longer, staring into the flames. My mood has vastly improved at the idea that others are alive on the nearby islands. Maybe Rose and Hux are OK too. I hope they are together and safe. Ben is in a good mood too. I like watching him smile.

  


We start talking about everything and nothing. He tells me silly stories from law school and I tell him about my antique store and all the crazy things Rose and I have done over the years. We find out that we both have a lot in common. We were both lonely kids growing up. 

  


At some point we start arguing about the  _ Empire of Stars _ movies. 

  


“Five is obviously the best.” He says.

  


“Obviously.” I agree. I would judge him harshly if he had said any different.

  


“So I would put them like this: 5, 4, 7, 6, 3, 8, 2, 1, 9.” He looks over to me to see if I agree. I do not. It must be written all over my face. 

  


“You didn’t like 8?” I ask, totally shocked. I like it a lot. 

  


“Hell no. 8 was a total shit show. They made one of my childhood heroes a grumpy old man, had a forced romance between two characters on a pointless side quest and killed a potentially cool villain for no reason. Episode 9 was only terrible because 8 left them nowhere good to go.” 

  


I sit staring at him in disbelief. “But, but. Wow. I don’t know what to say. Nine was pretty terrible but I like episode 8.”

  


“Well you shouldn’t. This is what happens when you make a trilogy of movies without having a clear plotline for all three before filming.” Ben shrugs and looks out toward the horizon again. He turns serious. The humor draining off his face. “Maybe tomorrow we should try to get to one of the nearby islands?” He suggests, turning to look at me intensely.

  


“I can’t swim.” I hate to burst his bubble but the idea of me swimming anywhere is preposterous. I’m lucky that I washed up on the beach and didn’t drown when the plane went down. 

  


“We’ll figure something out. Maybe we can build a raft. I think we should try to make our way to the big island.” His logic is sound. If there are other survivors, it would make sense for us all to gather at the same spot. The volcano on the big island makes me nervous, but if it’s going to erupt, we are going to die whether we are over here or over there. 

  


“How many people do you think were on our plane?” I pull my legs up to my chest and hug them.

  


“Well, the Corellian YT-1300 is fairly small. I think they only hold 200 people at maximum capacity, including crew. Our flight looked like it was maybe seventy-five percent full?”

  


“So there could be a hundred and fifty other people alive out there on the nearby islands, huddled around fires tonight, just like us?” It’s wishful thinking. We haven’t found any bodies yet, so I’m deluding myself with the idea that everyone survived. It could be accurate. 

  


“Yup. Just like us.” He scoots next to me and wraps an arm around me. I don’t know why but I start crying. Maybe it’s because I’ve allowed myself, for a very brief moment, to consider that maybe we are the only two survivors. Ben rubs a soothing circular pattern on my back. I rest my head on his shoulder.

  


“I hope Rose is Ok.” I sniff. As an afterthought I add, “And Hux.”

  


“If she’s with Hux, he won’t let anything happen to her. We’ll find them. Don’t worry.” I don’t know a lot about Hux, but Ben does, so I have to trust that his words are true.

  


I focus on the moon and try to keep my thoughts positive. We will find our friends and we will be rescued. At some point I feel myself nodding off. I do one of those head-bob things where you fall asleep sitting up and then jerk awake. Ben notices and laughs. We move over to our little shelter. It’s just two pieces of sheet metal leaned against each other. Ben assures me it won’t collapse upon us in the night. If it falls on top of us, it won’t be the worst thing that’s happened in the past 24 hours. 

  


There’s enough space in our little shelter for both of us to comfortably stretch out. Ben wraps an arm around me and pulls me close. He buries his face in my hair and lets out a loud slow breath. It makes me think of a balloon deflating. He keeps his arm draped around my middle and his hand doesn't wander. He’s been a perfect gentleman all day, so I allow it. Before long, we are both drifting to sleep. 

  


I dream.

  


***

  


I’m running along the beach. This is not a leisurely jog or some sort of fitness-induced morning run. I’m running for my life. He’s behind me and he’s angry. I know his long legs will make quick work of the small distance between us. If I can just get to the jungle, maybe I can hide somewhere and he won’t be able to find me.  _ Just run. Keep running.  _

  


I have his dagger and he wants it back. I know if I let him have it then I’m dead. My hair is loose and flowing, streaming behind me like a banner as I run.  _ Just run. Keep running. _

  


I turn my head to look behind me and it is a costly mistake. I don’t see him and in my panic, the long gauzy white dress that I am wearing wraps around my legs and causes me to trip. I stumble, and cry out, planting my hands in the sand. The dagger flies forward and lands a foot ahead of me. I reach out to grab it and in my haste, I cut my palm. The blood drips onto my white dress, an ill omen. I quickly straighten myself up. It takes only a second or two, but it was precious time that I didn’t have.  _ Just run. Keep running.  _

  


When I’m almost to the trees, I chance another glance back. He’s not there. Where is he? Where is he? I crash into something solid. I look up confused and find myself in the clutches of the devil. The black robed figure grabs my wrist, twisting my arm and easily retrieving the dagger from my hand. His black hood covers most of his face, but I see his lips twist into a cruel smile. He drags me into the forest.

  


I don’t want to go with him. I know where he’s taking me and I have no intention of going there. I claw and kick and scream and try everything I can think of to delay him. I even try to sweep his legs out from under him. He continues to drag me as if I was a rag doll. We reach the clearing and I can see the stone altar up ahead. 

  


_ No no no nonono _ ! I struggle even harder and it makes no difference. 

  


He stops just short of the altar and turns, pulling me to his chest. He reaches a hand up to my temple. As he does, the hood falls back from his face. I look into the face of Ben Solo, his eyes shining yellow in the night.

  


“Sleep.” he says. And I do.

  


***

  


I jerk awake and realize that I am alone. I miss the warmth of Ben’s body next to mine. I’m shivering uncontrollably, a combination of the cool breeze and the dream. I crawl out of our shelter to look for Ben. I see him immediately and relief washes over me. He’s standing by the fire looking out over the water. 

  


“Ben?” I call quietly. He doesn’t respond so I take a few steps closer to him. The fire is roaring so he must have just added some wood to it. “Ben, are you OK?”

  


“I heard someone calling my name.” His voice is quiet. I have to strain a little to make out what he is saying. He’s still looking out over the water. I notice that he’s holding the dagger, clutching it tightly, blade pointed upward in a menacing fashion. I shiver. He’s fucking scaring me right now.

  


“Who did you hear? One of the survivors? Was it Hux?” I stand by the fire and stop moving toward Ben. That dagger makes me nervous. I wish he had never touched it.

  


“No. I don’t know. It was … something else.” He shakes his head and it seems to pull him out of whatever reverie he had been in. “Let’s go back to sleep.”

  


He finally turns to face me and I jerk back a little in surprise. I know it’s either my imagination or some trick of the fire light, but I could swear his eyes were yellow.

  


“You’re bleeding.” He says quietly as he points to my hand. 

  


I glance down at my palm, the one the dagger sliced in my dream. A small gash runs across it, bleeding. I wipe the blood away and close my palm into a fist to try and stop the bleeding. 

  


“I must have cut it on the shelter or something.” I mumble. Ben nods and digs around in one of the suitcases for a suitable bandage. He hands me a tshirt which I wrap around it. 

  


I don’t want to worry him, so I don’t tell him about the dream.

  


Surely it is just a coincidence. Right?


	4. Chapter 4 - Day 2

Chapter 4 - Day 2

I wake up before Ben. The sun is rising and I can hear birds making a racket on the beach. I slide out from under Ben’s arm - he doesn’t stir - and I stumble out of the shelter into the morning light. My eyes drift to the beach. Bodies. Bodies everywhere. Corpses have washed onto the beach overnight with the tide and birds are now examining them for breakfast potential. I must have screamed, because Ben comes stumbling out of the shelter, knocking the metal sheets over in his haste. The crashing noise scares a few of the birds away.

Ben sees the bodies and pulls me into his arms, turning my face away from the beach. I don’t know how long we stand there with me whimpering and crying. He just holds me. The fire has died, but he somehow convinces me to sit down as he tries to rebuild it. He manages to get a small flame after a few minutes that fizzles out. He keeps trying to rekindle it, but he gives up in frustration a few minutes later. I’m sitting in stunned silence. I know that it is ridiculous to think that everyone would have survived the crash, but this many bodies is a devastating blow.

“We have to bury them.” I say, knowing it’s not really necessary. I’m having trouble thinking clearly.

He looks at me with skepticism. “I don’t think that’s a good idea. We should just focus on getting off this island.”

“We can’t leave them out in the open. Think of the families. They might want the bodies after we are rescued.” I’m grasping at straws here. I don’t really give a fuck about the families. I just know I wouldn’t want my corpse to be rotting on a beach.

He gives me a look. It’s a judgey look that I interpret to be questioning of my sanity. I can't say I blame him. I hear myself and I sound unhinged.

“Please, Ben. I can’t leave them like this.” I need him to agree with me. I just can’t leave them like this, food for birds all bloated and rotting on the beach.

He nods, a grim look of determination on his face. “I’ll do it. You stay here.” He sighs - one of those loud deep sighs that says  _ so much _ \- and stands. 

“No, I’m helping you.” I don’t really want to touch a bunch of corpses, but I know it will go faster if we do it together.

There are nine bodies in total - six men and three women. We search pockets for identification but only a few people have any on them. I memorize the names: Jabba Al-Hutt, Kenneth Greedo, Shmi Skywalker. One of the women is a flight attendant. Her name tag says “Kaydel.” Tears stream down my face as I look at hers. We look to be the same age. She could be me. I could be her. Why did she die instead of me? Questions with no answers. I know that I will remember their names forever.

It takes us several hours. We drag the bodies up to the beach and dig a small pit, covering them over with sand. I make a cross out of stones to lay on top of the sand mound to mark the area. When we finish, we collapse together on the sand next to each other.

“Should we say a prayer or something?” I ask aloud. I’m not religious. I haven’t found belief in a higher power to be useful or necessary in my life thus far.

“Don’t bother. Nobody’s listening. It’s just us now.” Ben says flatly. He stands up and walks toward the shoreline where a few more suitcases have washed up. He starts gathering them. I perk up as I recognize a familiar overnight bag in his hands.

“Hey! That’s mine!” He looks down at the bag and smiles. He tosses it to me and I unzip it to find my clothes, wet but otherwise in decent shape. I pull out the ticket stub sitting on top of the pile of clothes. Flight #923 from Chandrila to Ahch-To. What a nightmare this is turning out to be. I cram the ticket back in the bag and dig around until I find my bikini. It’s a red and white polka dot little number that I’ve never worn before. I’m not a swimmer. I bought it just for this trip. Might as well put it to some use. 

Ben stands over me and gives me a questioning look. I shrug as I say, “Didn’t you want to try to swim to the other island?” 

“Yeah. We can’t stay here.” 

“Well then, I’m putting on my bikini.” I stalk off into the trees to find a hidden spot to change. 

Between that stupid dagger, the nightmare and the corpses, I wonder if Flight #923 was actually a flight from Chandrila to Hell.

\---

Ben picks an island that he says looks the closest. I think it looks pretty fucking far, but who am I to judge? They all look far when you can’t swim and the only way to get there is through the water. Ben gathers bananas and coconuts and loads them into an empty suitcase. He makes a small floating raft contraption out of several airplane seat cushions and suitcases. 

“Am I supposed to sit on that?” I ask sarcastically. There is zero chance in hell that this will work. I’m going to drown. I survived a plane crash and now I’m going to drown for no good reason. Or get eaten by a shark. 

“No, I don’t think it will hold much weight. You are going to hold on to it while we swim.” He gives me an encouraging look.

I don’t say anything else. If it was up to me, we’d be trapped on the island, so I let Ben lead. I’m willing to do whatever it takes to get off this creepy island. 

We wade our raft out into the water until we are at the point where my feet no longer touch the bottom. I’m two seconds away from a full-blown panic attack, but Ben understands and anticipates. He encourages me the whole way. He talks as we swim, him with his powerful kicks, me with my pitiful puppy dog paddle. I cling to the raft as if my life depends on it (and it really does). Every wave that bobs us up and down in the water is terrifying. 

Ben talks. He talks about nothing. He just talks and talks and keeps me distracted and keeps me paddling along. He sings show tunes and his voice is pretty terrible. It keeps me going. We swim for fucking hours. The sun goes from high in the sky to low and low and lower. It’s going to get dark if we don’t reach the island soon. It still seems so far away. I swear it’s not getting any closer, but it is. It starts getting bigger and bigger. We can see smoke from a fire burning. It makes me paddle harder. Ben’s been doing most of the leg work, pun intended, and I feel bad. He never complains, he never stops. He just keeps swimming. At some point I notice a man standing on the beach, waving at us.

As we finally reach shallow water, the man starts wading out to help us in. He is dark skinned, young - maybe my age - and wearing a Resistance Airlines uniform. It comforts me immediately to know that one of the crew is still alive. Surely he’s had some kind of training about what to do in the event of a crash-stranded-in-hell type situation.

“I can’t believe it!” He shouts excitedly, he grabs my arm and pulls me off the cushions into a standing position. The water is about waist high out here. I’m not in any danger of drowning anymore. “I thought for sure we were the only survivors!” 

“We?” Ben asks. Poor Ben. He looks exhausted. Between the burial this morning and the hours of steering our makeshift raft he looks ready to drop. 

“Yeah, it’s me, a woman named Phasma and this little kid. My name is Finn. I was the flight attendant for the business class passengers.” He extends his hand and flashes a toothy grin. I decide that I like him already. Sometimes you just know about people.

  
“I’m Rey and this is Ben. We were in first class.” We all shake hands and Finn leads us up to their makeshift camp. We meet Phasma, who is a tall blonde woman with a severe scowl on her face. She looks like she’s almost as tall as Ben and ten times meaner. I get a strange vibe off of her.

I look at the small boy sitting by the fire, clutching a doll that I recognize. I walk over and sink down in the sand next to him, close enough to be comforting but not close enough to scare him away. He’s a total cutie pie with shaggy sandy blonde hair and blue eyes. He’s just staring into the flames. I don’t think he even noticed me approaching.

  
  
“Hi,” I say with a smile, “My name is Rey. That guy over there is my friend Ben. What’s your name?”

“Anakin.” He says quietly. He stares vacantly into the flames and doesn’t cry. He whispers, “My Mommy is gone.” 

“Oh sweetie, I’m sure she’s OK. She’s probably on one of these islands worrying about you. What’s your Mommy’s name?”

“Shmi Skywalker.” I die. I absolutely fucking die when I hear the name but I know I can’t tell him that his mother is dead. I keep a friendly smile plastered on my face. I feel my lower lip quivering so I bite it a little and breathe in and out through my nose a few times. I do what I do best, I avoid. I deflect. I change the subject.

“Is this Shane from  _ Empire of Stars _ ?” I point to his doll. I somehow choke out the question with a happy smile plastered on my face. Anakin perks up and nods excitedly.

“Do you like him too?” He asks.

“Oh yeah. He’s my favorite.” I say with a smile. “I like him because he’s not really as bad as everyone thinks. He’s really a good guy the whole time.” There are tears in my eyes, but I’m not going to fucking cry right now. I don’t want this kid to think something is wrong. 

“Yeah, he’s pretty cool. He has the coolest sword too!” Anakin starts rattling off his favorite scenes from all nine movies. I smile and nod along, casually glancing over my shoulder to see what the others are doing. Finn is gesturing at something on the horizon. Ben has his arms crossed in front of him in a defensive posture. Phasma looks bitchy. Everyone has a scowl on their face. They don’t appear to be getting along. _ Great. _

Ben and Finn walk back to the water and begin dragging our makeshift raft up to the beach. By the time they get done, they seem to be in better moods. Phasma shows us the pile of suitcases that they have found. I pull her aside and ask about bodies. She says they have only found two, an older man and woman that they buried further down the beach. I tell her about Anakin's mother and she agrees to keep it quiet.

I hear Ben let out a laugh as he pulls up a suitcase from the pile. He opens it and digs around inside, producing a ring box from inside. He holds it up with a triumphant look on his face.

“I was worried that I was going to be fired from my Best Man gig if I lost these.” He opens the box to display two wedding bands. 

  
  
I smile, my eyes filling with tears. “I know that Rose and Hux will be happy to see them.” 

This, of course, is assuming we ever see them again.


	5. Chapter 5 - Night 2 - We've Done This Before

Chapter 5 - Night 2 - We’ve done this before

I’m trying to open a coconut by banging it with a sharp rock when it occurs to me that the cut on my hand from last night is gone. Fuck. I can’t believe I didn’t notice until now. I guess between the bodies that washed up this morning and our journey in the water, I didn’t even think about it. I examine my palm in detail. There isn’t even a scar. 

“What’s wrong?” Ben squats next to me in the sand. “Did you hurt yourself?” He grabs the coconut from me and starts sawing away at it with the dagger. Up close I can see that there are strange symbols carved in the blade. It makes me uneasy. I wonder what they mean. Probably nothing good.   
  


I glance over to the fire to see who might be listening. Finn and Anakin have gone off to look for firewood and Phasma is ignoring us. I don’t want any of them to know about the strange things that happened on the other island. They will think we are crazy. I would think it too if I heard about wounds magically healing and a mystery dagger appearing at a creepy altar. “The cut from last night is gone.” I whisper, showing him my palm.

“What cut?” He stops sawing at the coconut to look at my hand, and then my face. “I don’t remember you getting hurt last night.” His brow has a deep wrinkle in it.

“Yeah, remember when I woke up and you were standing out on the beach? I cut my hand? We wrapped it up in a t-shirt.” 

He gives me a blank look, shrugs and resumes sawing at the coconut. “Nope. Don’t remember.”

  
“Ben, how do you not remember that? You said that you heard someone call your name and that’s why you woke up.” That totally happened, right? Yes. I know it did.

He stops trying to open the coconut again. This time when he looks up, he looks a little angry. When he speaks next, his tone is clipped. “I don’t know what to tell you Rey. Maybe you dreamed it? I never got up in the middle of the night. I don’t remember you hurting your hand.” 

I stare at him aghast.  _ Did I dream it?  _ I open my mouth to argue with him when we hear the sound of a man shouting. It’s not coming from the island, but from the water. We both stand up and in the dimming light of the setting sun, we see a man in an orange inflatable raft, paddling toward us. I notice the Resistance Airlines uniform and his curly hair and recognize him as our pilot, Captain Dameron.

Finn drops the armload of twigs that he is carrying and bolts toward the water, waving his arms. “POE!” He bellows, loud enough for people to hear a thousand miles away. We all help Captain Dameron, whose name is apparently Poe, to shore. He embraces Finn in a tight hug before stepping back to survey our little group. 

“This day is getting better and better!” He smiles. “Is it just the five of you?” 

Finn nods, “Yeah, just five.” He lowers his voice so Anakin doesn’t hear, “We found two bodies on this beach and these two found another nine on their beach before they met up with us.” 

Poe nods. “Ok. We’ve got a camp set up on the big island with about thirty people so far. After the crash, people got scattered all over these little islands, so I’ve been taking the raft to rescue them. You are my last trip for the night. Let’s get loaded up and head out while we still have a little light left.”

Finn makes quick introductions. Everyone seems to be in a good mood, even Phasma is smiling. The idea of being with a larger group makes me feel a lot better. Safety in numbers, or so they say. We load as many suitcases, coconuts and bananas as we can safely fit in the raft before setting off. The sun has dipped below the waterline at this point, but we can still see. The large island is not too far away. Poe, Finn and Ben all take turns with the paddle.

Anakin snuggles next to me and I wrap my arm around him. “Maybe my Mom is over there.” He says quietly.

Knife to the heart. I know that I will have to tell him the truth at some point, but not today.

“Maybe.” I whisper, giving him a gentle squeeze.

“Don’t worry kid, we’ll take good care of you until we find her.” Poe says. “We have a big feast planned tonight. As soon as I get back, there’s a wedding happening. This couple was supposed to get married today on Ahch-to. I’m an ordained minister so I agreed to marry them on the beach tonight.”

Ben and I perk up.

“Who is the couple?” I shriek, pitching forward toward Poe. The little raft bobs unsteadily in the water. A few seconds of panic later, the raft is once again steady.

“This tall pasty redhead named Armitage and a feisty little cutie named Rose.” Poe sees the look on my face and smiles, “So I take it that you know them?”

“We’re the Maid of Honor and the Best Man!” I say point to myself and Ben. “I knew they were alive!” Tears are streaming down my face. Anakin grabs my hand and gives it a squeeze. I should be the one comforting him. My tears are those of relief and I know that there will be none for him. The thought makes me cry even harder.

By the time we reach the large island, I have managed to pull myself together. As soon as the raft reaches the shallow water, Rose runs out and practically drags me off the thing and into the water. She’s freakishly strong. I make a mental note never to get on her bad side. 

Rose blubbers and cries incoherently. It’s nice to be missed. I watch Ben and Hux shake hands. Ben slips Hux the ring box and Hux smiles. I’ve never seen him smile before, but then again I don’t really know him that well.

“So I hear there’s a wedding tonight?” I ask Rose. I must admit, I’m a little surprised that they were going to get married without me, Ben or her sister present.

“Yeah, but we will get married for real after we get rescued. I don’t even have my dress or my veil here.” She looks down at the ripped dress she has on. Hux had paid to have the wedding parties’ attire shipped to Ahch-to a few weeks ago so that we wouldn’t have to worry about the dresses getting lost by the airline last minute. I’m a tiny bit relieved because Rose picked out a hideous orange dress for the bridesmaids. I have nothing against the color orange, but it makes my skin look odd so I hardly ever wear it.

“I happen to have several cute sundresses crammed into my bag. One of them is white and I think it will fit you.” I grab my bag in one hand, and Rose in the other and drag her off toward the trees for some privacy. I want to ask her a million questions. I want to know how they survived and if strange things have been happening here. I want to tell her about my dreams and Ben’s crazy scary dagger. I keep my mouth shut. I’m the Maid of Honor and my job is to keep the bride calm and happy.

Rose tries on three of my sundresses and in the end, she settles on a white lace beach dress. It’s a little long on her, but she looks adorable. Very bohemian. I pick a blue dress to wear. I grab a bunch of tropical pink flowers off a nearby bush and tuck one behind her ear and one behind mine. 

We make our way back to the beach and everyone has formed a little cluster with an aisle down the middle. Ben and Hux are waiting at the front of the group with Poe. Anakin is the ring bearer. Someone has scattered flowers on the sand and made little torches to line the path. 

  
I move to walk down the aisle before Rose, but she grabs my arm and holds me back. “I need you to give me away.” She looks into my eyes with a hopeful expression. I’m touched by the request. I might cry if I have to say anything, so I merely nod and smile. I walk Rose down the aisle and hand her over to Hux, taking my place at the front. 

The ceremony is a blur. It’s short and sweet, devoid of any religious or ridiculous overly sappy sentiments. I survey the little crowd gathered around and my eye catches sight of an old woman who is very clearly staring at me and not at the happy couple. Odd. Captain Dameron pronounces the couple man and wife and Rose dives into Hux’s arms for a big romantic kiss. The little crowd cheers and claps. I look over to Ben and he’s giving me a look that’s absolutely predatory. It’s like he’s devouring me with his eyes. I suddenly want to drag him off into the woods and do bad things to him. Maybe I will. 

After the ceremony, the crowd forms around the bonfire, people take turns singing old romantic songs and everyone is dancing and drinking from coconuts. There’s no booze but it’s still a hopping party. Rose looks so happy. It’s not the wedding they had imagined, but it really does turn into a lovely night. Hux and Rose are dancing. Poe has taken Anakin under his wing. It’s like everyone has forgotten, just for a while, how we really ended up here. I breathe a sigh of relief. I can take a few minutes to myself without worrying. I look up and lock eyes with Ben Solo across the small crowd. He gestures toward the trees and I nod, making my way through the crowd to follow him. 

We walk a little way into the jungle, making sure that we are not seen. Ben holds my hand and leads me toward the sound of running water. We find a beautiful waterfall, with a small cave behind it. He leads me toward the cave. I’m hesitant, because of the darkness, but he stops us just inside the entrance where the stars and moon light our way. Nobody will see us out here.

“Hi.” I say, stopping in front of him. It’s a stupid pick up line, but it’s worked for me before.

“Hi.” He says. The look he is giving me right now could literally cause me to burst into flames. Or take off my panties. Either one. “You look beautiful.” He reaches up a hand and touches the little tropical flower that is tucked behind my ear. 

I laugh flirtatiously as I swivel my hips a little and watch his eyes travel down my body. “I bet you say that to all the girls you lure into the woods.” The dress I’m wearing is a Grecian-style light blue number that leaves little to the imagination. The dress is backless and the neckline plunges almost down to my navel. The skirt is a soft flowy chiffon that stops just above my knees.

He laughs aloud. It’s a rich, deep laugh that does something to the pit of my stomach. I clench my thighs together. 

“You got me.” He jokes before wrapping an arm around my waist, pulling me closer. His other hand finds its way into my hair, pulling my head back. He leans in and crushes his lips to mine. I moan into the kiss and I can tell he’s smiling. I gently nibble his lower lip and he _ growls  _ at me. I feel myself getting embarrassingly wet from just the sound of his growl. It’s been a while since my last tryst and it doesn’t take much to get me going.

Ben spins me around so that my back is pressed to his front. I can feel his erection pressing into my back. He slides one hand into the top of my dress, cupping a breast and gently squeezing. His other hand finds its way up under my skirt and into my underwear. I got a Brazilian bikini wax the day before the flight and I am immediately grateful that Rose talked me into it. Ben hums in approval as he runs a finger over my damp folds. 

“So wet already.” He murmurs, dipping a finger inside me. He uses my own natural lubrication to coat his finger before slowly circling my clit. He has a practiced hand and I briefly wonder how many other women he’s done this to before. I quickly force the thought out of my head. I focus on my own pleasure for a change. Just this moment. Nothing else matters.

He gently pinches my nipple and I gasp. My legs start shaking and I’m worried they will give out and I will collapse into a heap on the cave floor. I’m leaning against Ben for support as he pumps his fingers in and out of my cunt. His hot ragged breath is in my ear. 

“Get on your hands and knees.” He says authoritatively. That sounds like a fantastic idea to me. I sink to the ground and look over my shoulder at him as he drops his pants to the floor. I hear the metallic clang of the dagger as it hits the ground. He never lets that fucking dagger out of his sight. It doesn’t matter right now. I hike my skirt up to my waist and wiggle suggestively. He grins and sinks down to the ground behind me, pulling my panties down to my knees. 

He grabs my hips and thrusts into me in one sharp move and it feels fucking incredible. I don’t think I’ve ever been with someone this big before but I ignore the brief moment of discomfort. The angle is perfect. It’s almost too much, too good. As he slowly thrusts in and out, he lets out a string of filthy things that my mind barely absorbs. I’m busy focusing on the feeling of being absolutely full of Ben Solo and my building orgasm. 

He’s very chatty during sex and I’m not. I just need him to fuck me and be quiet, so I tell him. “Sshh! No talking. Just fucking.” 

“Yes ma’am.” He says, and thankfully that is the last thing he says. The only sounds are the slapping of our bodies, heavy breathing and my moans. He fists a hand into my hair and gives it a not so gentle tug. Ooooh, I really like that. His slow thrusts evolve into him pounding into me with wild abandon. As he comes, I briefly panic about my lack of birth control pills over the past few days. Oh well. The temporary panic doesn’t keep me from enjoying my own release.

The sound of the waterfall covers my scream as I shatter to pieces on his cock.

\---

As Ben and I emerge from the trees, we blend back into the impromptu wedding reception on the beach. Nobody seems to have noticed that we were missing. I’m standing near the tree line, watching Rose and Hux slow dance while an older guy sings a Rod Stewart song. The old woman that was staring at me during the wedding wanders over. She’s about half my height, wearing crazy thick glasses. She puts her hands on her hips and looks me up and down. Something about it makes me uncomfortable. I feel like I should know who she is. Have I met her before? I try to think back to the flight. She wasn’t in the first class cabin. Maybe I’m just remembering her from the waiting area at the airport.

“Well, you’re new here. I’m Maz.” She sticks out a hand and I shake it. She has a nice firm grip, almost masculine.

_ Aren’t we all new here? _ I nod and decide to make polite small talk. “I’m Rey. Yeah, we just got here tonight. We were on another island.”

“No, No. I mean you’ve never made it this far before. He usually kills you by now.”

My mouth drops open. I don’t even know how to begin processing what she just told me.She looks at my confused face with her eyebrows raised.

“You don’t remember yet? Not having any  déjà vu or strange dreams?”

“Dreams. Yes.” I whisper quietly. I look over her shoulder to make sure nobody is staring at us. I don’t know where Ben has gotten off to. I lean in closer to her. “What’s happening? Something’s not right here.”

“We’ve done this before. Over and over. This is the first time you’ve made it to this island, so you must be doing something right.”

“I don’t understand. What do you mean?”

“Time is repeating. Every time you die, it resets. This is the fifteenth time we have crashed, that I’m aware of. It could be more than that. Next time, try and remember. If you focus on a thought really hard as you are dying, you will remember it next time.”

“What?” _ Is this a joke? Are hidden cameras watching us? _ “That’s not possible. We can’t relive moments in time. There are no second chances. You must be mistaken.”

“Time is not a straight line, my young friend. Something went wrong the first time and until we figure out what it is and fix it, we will be stuck in the loop.” 

“How will I know what to fix? What do I do?” I’m about two seconds away from a panic attack. 

Maz reaches out and grabs my hand, “Just don’t let him kill you. Stay alive as long as possible and maybe you will stumble upon the right path. Good luck kid.” She lets my hand go and walks away.

Just don’t let him kill me? Who does she mean? Ben? Awesome advice. I don’t have any plans to be murdered by him, or anyone else for that matter. I’m pretty sure that old woman is bat shit crazy. Maybe the stress of the plane crash has caused her to have a mental breakdown. 

It’s preposterous, right? The idea that we are stuck living the same terrible event over and over - totally preposterous. I shake my head as if to clear the thoughts. As I mix back into the crowd to join the party, I can’t shake the terrible feeling of dread that maybe Maz is right.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That you for all the comments & kudos. This story is about to get super crazy. The time loop idea is inspired by "Russian Doll" on Netflix. If you haven't watched it, go do that immediately. It's amazing.


	6. Chapter 6 - Day 3

Chapter 6 - Day 3

I wake early and find that my body is tangled with Ben’s. He’s mostly on top of me and his muscular thigh is pressed between my legs in such a way that I could probably work myself into an orgasm if I wasn’t so preoccupied with Maz’s words from the prior evening. _ He usually kills you by now. _

I gently try to extract myself from under Ben’s limbs without waking him up. He’s snoring lightly, face down in the sand. I don’t remember falling asleep with him last night. In fact, I don’t remember much after talking to Maz. I think Ben and I danced a little? What did I do after that?. It’s bothering me that I can remember. A whole chunk of my evening is missing from my memory and it’s not like I can blame alcohol. How did I end up alone with Ben? 

The sun has just popped up over the horizon, shading the sky beautiful shades of pink and orange. Ben and I were curled up on the beach, up by the tree line. I stand and look around. Where are the others? I see the little campsite from last night about a hundred or so feet away. The fire has died down and only a little smoke is rising from it now. Maybe I’m the first one awake. I start walking toward the campsite. I guess I can try to rebuild the fire so we can boil some water or try to cook something when everyone wakes up. 

I look around, wondering where everyone is sleeping. As I squat by the firepit, I notice a dark stain on the sand and all over a large rock. I reach my hand out to touch it, but hesitate because it looks like blood. I’m sure it’s not blood, but, ugh yes, it’s blood. I stare at the red sandy smear on my fingertips and quickly try to wipe it off in the sand. Something bad obviously happened last night.

I sprint back to where Ben is still passed out on the beach. 

“Ben!” I shout as I run, “Ben, wake up!” He must sleep like a rock because he doesn’t respond or move. For some reason I panic that he might be dead, even though he was recently snoring. I land on top of him and turn him around, trying to pull him into a sitting position. 

“Mmm. Good morning, Princess. Ready for more?” His hands slide down to cup my ass. I can tell he’s still mostly asleep but I don’t really care. I slap him across the face, hard. My hand stings and he turns his face back to mine with a look of anger and confusion. He’s fully awake now. 

“There’s blood all over the campsite and everyone else is gone!” I’m trying not to get hysterical but that seems to be my default mode lately.

Ben pushes me off of his lap and jumps up to survey the beach. He extends a hand and pulls me into a standing position. I lead him back to the campsite and point to the blood stain. As he bends down to survey it, I notice the dagger tucked into his belt. I’m starting to get irritated with his dagger obsession. I wonder how mad he would be if I hid it from him.

“I, umm, I can’t remember what happened after you and me . . .  _ you know _ . . . in the cave.” I wonder if he remembers that part. I thought it was pretty good. It would be a shame for him not to remember.

“You mean after you told me to shut up and fuck you and then you came hard on my cock? Yeah, I remember that. Don’t think I’ll be forgetting that any time soon.” He winks at me and then sets a serious look on his face. I can see the gears turning in his head. “After that . . . we . .” His voice trails off as he shakes his head. “Fuck, I can’t remember. I talked to Hux for a few minutes? How did we end up way down there?” 

“I don’t know. We better go look for everybody. Maybe there was a fight or something? Someone was obviously injured, maybe even killed.” I am very uneasy. Why would an entire group of people go missing? If everyone went somewhere, why wouldn’t they take us with them? Something is horribly wrong. 

Ben agrees with my desire to search the island. I take a minute to change into a new dress. The one I was wearing last night isn’t exactly appropriate for a jungle search and rescue expedition. I select the most practical dress in my bag, a knee length red dress with white tropical flowers on it. Unfortunately I don’t have any practical shoes, just flip flops. 

We head off into the jungle, heading first for the cave we found last night. It would be a good place for people to sleep in. I stare into the little waterfall, trying to calm myself as Ben peeks into the cave from last night and finds nothing. No sign of the others at all. We haven’t seen any footprints or personal items. We haven’t heard anyone yelling for help. We haven’t found any more blood, which I think is a positive sign. We haven’t found a single thing. 

Ben shrugs as he exits the cave. We find what looks like a path leading deeper into the jungle, so we follow it. We walk side by side, and go slowly, looking off into the foliage to make sure we aren’t missing anything.

Ben spots it first. A stone structure becomes visible through the trees. We pick up our pace a little. The closer we get, the worse I feel. As we step into a clearing, we realize the structure is a very large stone pyramid. I visibly shudder. What is it with creepy stone structures on these islands? I guess a pyramid is better than a sacrificial altar, but not by much. 

“This reminds me of the Sith ruins at Mustafar.” Ben muses, “Hux and I stayed at one of those all-inclusive resorts there after college graduation. We took a day trip to see the ruins. They let you climb the pyramid and at the top is this stone altar where they used to do human sacrifices. It was pretty cool.” 

  
I look at Ben with my mouth open a little in a combination of horror and confusion. “Sith ruins? Do you think that’s what these might be?” I really hope that these are not Sith ruins. The Sith were an ancient order of men who murdered for fun and practiced dark magical arts. Not a lot is actually known about them. People who had knowledge of their mysterious order were all killed off in horrible ways. The belief is that the order no longer exists but conspiracy theorists claim they are still an active group. Hiding in plain sight among us.

“Nah, Mustafar is really far away from here. I don’t think the Sith spread this far. These probably belong to a tribal people that are no longer here. Let’s go check it out.” Ben grabs my hand and drags me along, despite my loudly vocalized protests. It’s like he doesn’t even care that I am clearly terrified of being here. As he starts climbing the stairs, I pull my hand free and take a step away from him.

“No, Ben. I’m not climbing up there. I think we should head back to the beach and see if the others have returned.” I cross my arms in front of my chest.

“What are you afraid of, some Sith ghosts?” He chuckles and turns to face me. For a second, I swear his eyes glow yellow. I blink and everything is back to normal. I must have imagined it. The idea that Sith might have been here is utterly terrifying. It’s clouding my perception of the island. 

Ben studies my face and seems to realize how serious I am. He nods and takes hold of my hand again, leading me back through the jungle toward the beach. 

By the time we get back to the campsite, the tide has come in. Everyone is still gone. We sit down by the fire pit and Ben pulls out his dagger to cut open a coconut for me. 

I take a giant swig of coconut water. It tastes amazing. For half a second I can trick myself into enjoying the beauty of the tropical island. I close my eyes and try to relax. I’m sure everyone is OK. They will turn up. Things will be fine. Nobody was killed. There are no Sith ghosts on the island. Half a second is the only peace I get.

“Fuck.” Ben mutters. I look up and he has jabbed his palm with the dagger while trying to open another coconut. He stands up and walks toward the water, I assume to clean his wound. He leaves the dagger behind. I stare at the sinister blade. I swear it looks like it’s glowing red. The air seems to have gotten heavy and as I lean toward the dagger, I feel an uncontrollable urge to touch it. Like it’s calling my name. This dagger is fucking evil.

“Ben, I think we need to get rid of the dagger.” I call out to where he is bent over in the water, about twenty feet away. I don’t think he’s going to be very happy with me.

“The dagger stays with me.” He says coldly. He doesn’t turn to look at me, but continues washing off his wound.

“Don’t you feel like things have gone very strangely since you found that dagger? I think it’s a Sith weapon and I think you need to stop using it. Let’s throw it in the ocean or something.” He straightens up now but keeps his back to me. His posture is very tense and stiff. I think I may have crossed a line. I hope he doesn’t yell at me. I’ll probably cry. “Ben?”

“Ben? Ben Solo is gone.” He turns to look at me, yellow eyes glowing. 

“What?” I squeak out. What the fuck is going on? Is he messing with me? Is he having a nervous breakdown? Am I hallucinating? Is this a dream?

“I killed Ben Solo, just like I killed the others.” He starts taking slow steps toward me, splashing in the water. I sit frozen by the remnants of the campfire, just arm's reach away from that stupid dagger. If he tries to hurt me, I’m going to stab him with it. My brain is working so slow. It hasn’t caught up yet. Wait. Did he say he killed everyone? What the fuck? What the fuck?!?

“If you killed Ben Solo, then who are you?” I’m eyeing the dagger. I know as soon as I touch it, he’s going to start running for me. He has to be like fifty times faster than I am. I’m so fucked. I remember Maz’s warning.  _ He usually kills you by now. _ She meant Ben.

“You can call me Kylo Ren.” His voice is creepy quiet. He’s about fifteen feet away from me now. If I’m going to run, now would be the time.

I grab the dagger and take off running down the beach. He’s startled by my rash decision and I get a headstart of several seconds. I’m running for my life. He’s behind me and he’s angry. I know his long legs will make quick work of the small distance between us. If I can just get to the jungle, maybe I can hide somewhere and he won’t be able to find me.  _ Just run. Keep running.  _

I turn my head to look behind me and it is a costly mistake. I don’t see him and in my panic, I trip over my own feet and fall, planting my hands in the sand. The dagger flies forward and lands a foot ahead of me. I reach out to grab it and in my haste, I cut my palm. The blood drips onto the sand, an ill omen. I quickly straighten myself up. It takes only a second or two, but it was precious time that I didn’t have.  _ Just run. Keep running.  _

When I’m almost to the trees, I chance another glance back. He’s not there. Where is he? Where is he? I crash into something solid. I look up confused and find myself in the clutches of the devil. Ben. No, not Ben. Kylo Ren. I’m convinced now that the dagger has possessed him. Some sort of demon or evil spirit. His strength seems to have multiplied, he twists my arm and easily retrieves the dagger from my hand. I see his lips twist into a cruel smile. He drags me into the jungle.

I don’t want to go with him. I know where he’s taking me and I have no intention of going there. I claw and kick and scream and try everything I can think of to delay him. I even try to sweep his legs out from under him. He continues to drag me as if I was a rag doll. We reach the clearing and I can see the pyramid up ahead. 

_ No no no nonono _ ! I struggle even harder and it makes no difference. 

He stops just short of the pyramid’s base and turns, pulling me to his chest. He reaches a hand up to my temple. As he does, I look into the face of Ben Solo, or is it Kylo Ren, his eyes shining yellow in the night. The eyes of a demon.

“Sleep.” he says. And I do.

***

A crack of thunder startles me awake. It’s so loud that I swear the whole island is shaking. Fat raindrops begin falling from the sky. They are surprisingly cold on my naked skin. Without having to look around I already know where I am. I’m laying on the stone altar at the top of the pyramid, my hands and feet are tied. It’s just like from that vision I had. I try to sit up but the ropes are preventing me from moving much. I notice my body has been painted with strange symbols. I start thrashing my body, trying to pull the ropes loose but they aren’t giving at all. 

Unless there’s some sort of miracle about to happen, I don’t see a way out of this. I remember what Maz said, think of something before you die and you remember it in the next loop.

_ Don’t let him get the dagger. Don’t let him get the dagger. Don’t let him get the dagger. _

It’s the only thing I can think of that might actually help me in the next time loop. Everything started going bad after he grabbed that stupid dagger.

Ben steps up to the altar, cloaked in black. The hood of his robe is up, but I know it’s him. Who else would it be? He holds his long jagged dagger, the red blade glowing. He raises the dagger high above his head. 

I close my eyes.  _ Don’t let him get the dagger. Don’t let him get the dagger. Don’t let him- _

The airport terminal. Rose is talking to me and I have no idea what she’s saying.

Glancing down to my lap, I see a glossy brochure for our destination, Ahch-To. I run my finger over the photo of the black sandy beach on the cover. I look up at Rose with an apologetic smile. “Sorry, Rosie. I got distracted by the amazing photos in here. What were you saying?”

She points toward the gate where people are lining up. “They are getting ready to start boarding the first class seats.” 

  
An eerie feeling of  déjà vu washes over me. There was something I was supposed to remember. Or something I was supposed to do? But what?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you, as always, for the comments and kudos. Check out my other works!  
> Completed - Ten Wise Jedi - An Agatha Christie Style murder mystery  
> Completed - The Neighborhood - FBI Agents Ben & Rey  
> WIP - Hello Again, Little Rabbit - dark vampire story   
> WIP - Valley of the Dead - Historical AU with Egyptologist Ben Solo and a mummy!  
> WIP - You Imagine and Ocean - Pirate Ben Solo


	7. Chapter 7 - Begin again

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for all the comments & kudos.   
> Raise your hand if you think Rey will remember what happened last time and be able to save herself this time around? ;)

Chapter 7 - Begin again

Every day we make hundreds of innocuous decisions. Get up or sleep in? What to wear? Pink eyeshadow or purple? Ponytail or braid? Decaf or Regular? Uber or walk? Call or text? Zig or zag? These seemingly simple choices that we make all day long have no noticeable effect on the outcome of the day. 

But, if you were to live the same day over and over again, would you always make the same choices? 

And if you changed one tiny thing, how much would it change the future?

***

The idea that I’m forgetting something is making my anxiety worse. I’m already scared of flying. At least, I’m scared of the idea of flying. I’ve never done it before. What did I forget? My passport? My ticket? I grab my bag and pry it open. My passport and ticket are sitting on top. Flight #923, first class ticket to paradise. I notice the screen of my cellphone has a missed call from Hux, Rose’s fiancé. Oops. I unlock my phone and see a series of texts from him. “Hux texted. Ben had a flat tire and they are running late. They are going through security now.” 

Tucking my phone back into my bag, I look around the terminal and lock eyes with a cute little kid with sandy blonde hair. He’s maybe ten years old. I’m not a good judge of age, having no children myself. He has these piercing blue eyes and he keeps staring at me and I swear it's like he’s looking into my soul. Maybe he’s looking at someone behind me? I glance over my shoulder behind me and look around. Nope. I turn back and flash the kid a smile. He doesn't smile back, just keeps staring at me. Why are kids so creepy? I return my attention to Rose who is fretting over the guys being late.

A few minutes later, I spy Hux making his way through the crowd. Following behind him is . . .  _ wait… have I met him before?  _ He’s absolutely gorgeous and seems totally familiar. I know that I’ve never officially met him before, but . . . have I? I can’t shake the feeling that I know him from somewhere. Maybe I’ve seen him around town somewhere. Maybe he wandered into my antique store at one point? I don’t know. I’m sure it will come to me eventually. Rose makes a brief introduction and Ben doesn’t look up from his phone. Lawyers have trouble leaving work at the office. Rose says Hux does it all the time.

Ben Solo is looking down typing something furiously on his phone. I briefly imagine those fingers running over my body instead of that stupid cellphone. If he bothered to look up at me, I might actually attempt flirting. I decide to be a little bold. It’s vacation and if he rejects me, then I never have to see him again after this week. You only live once, right? I clear my throat in a not so subtle way and he looks up at me. 

“Are you always playing around on your phone? You’re on vacation now, ya know.” I tease him. 

A slight blush creeps across his face and he tucks his phone back into his pocket. The first class passengers begin shuffling down the jetway to board the plane. Ben offers to carry my bag for me and I allow it. I’m a feminist but I’m not about to turn down a man trying to be chivalrous. Besides, it allows me the opportunity to walk down the jetway slightly in front of him so that he can have a view of my ass in my pale yellow sundress. I’m in a good mood now. I’m wearing my lucky hot pink undies and am swaying my hips slightly more than necessary to make sure he gets the best view possible. 

“Watch out!” He cries, as a woman steps on the back of my flip-flops causing me to stumble. His arm shoots out to steady me, preventing me from falling face first into the ground. The bitch who stepped on my flip flop keeps walking and doesn't even apologize. Ben shoots her a murderous look before turning back to me. “Are you OK?” He asks, giving me the once over. I nod and he seems satisfied. 

“Well at least nobody saw my underwear!” I exclaim. I immediately regret saying it as soon as I see the awkward look on his face. Oh well, there goes my chances of getting to hook up with the Best Man this week. I’m keeping a stupid smile plastered on my face. I think it will keep me from crying or dying of embarrassment. I hope.

“Right. Umm, we should get going.” Lawyers are always so practical. At this point all the other first class passengers have passed us. As the passengers board the plane, we are greeted by Captain Dameron. He flashes me a wide toothy grin, welcomes me on board and I feel myself blushing.

“He doesn’t look old enough to be flying a plane.” I mutter, mostly to myself. I can see the beginning of a smile on the lips of Ben Solo. 

“This is a Corellian YT-1300f, they practically fly themselves.” Ben deposits our bags into an overhead compartment. I must have given him a strange look. He shrugs and says, “My dad was a pilot.”

I scoot past him and sit in my seat, immediately buckling my belt and pulling it tight. I’m about to begin a calming meditation and read that stupid pamphlet about the emergency exits, but Ben starts talking. He starts telling me all about when he met Hux and their ridiculous college adventures. I tell him about my antique store and he actually seems interested. Maybe he’s just pretending to know about antiques just to get in my pants, but I’m not going to question it. I still can’t figure out where I know him from. Maybe I’ve just seen pictures of him tagged on Rose’s Facebook or something. 

The twenty minutes that it takes to get the other passengers on board and in their seats goes by in a flash. He distracts me from remembering how terrified I am to fly. Maybe he’s a little nervous too? He’s certainly chatty like someone who is nervous. 

He sets his hand on top of mine while the plane taxis on the runway. The actual takeoff is not as bad as I imagined. Rose had been right, the window seat gave me something to focus on. Watching the Chandrila International Airport shrink and disappear as we soared into the clouds was fascinating. Ben lets go of my hand once the Captain removes the seat belt indicator and announces that we have reached our cruising altitude. Only five and a half hours to go until we land in paradise. Maybe I can take a nap. The in-flight movie is some horrible romantic comedy that Rose and I have watched on Netflix half a dozen times. I don’t really need to see it again but Ben admits that he’s never seen it, so I  _ have _ to watch it with him.

A flight attendant appears a few minutes later to take our drink orders. I decide we need something that pairs with watching a girly in-flight movie. “We are going to need two glasses of champagne please.” Ben chuckles and nods. Good boy.

\---

I am jolted awake by a woman’s scream in the cabin. For a minute I forget where I am. I’m too confused to be afraid. I look over to Ben and he looks worried. He’s quickly buckling his seat belt and I do the same. I lift the window shade and see the thunderstorm outside. The lightning is close. Far too close. Turbulence rocks the plane and we bounce in our seats. For one horrible second the plane drops and my stomach feels like it's been sucked out of my body. Even the seasoned fliers look uncomfortable. The flight attendants are ordered by the captain to return to their seats.

  
I begin a mantra. “The plane is not going to crash. The plane is not going to crash. The plane is not going to crash.” I think I’m saying it in my head but I must have said it outloud because Ben looks horrified. He grabs my face, his large hands cupping each side.

“Look at me.” He commands, and for some reason I obey. His eyes are wide and shiny. He is afraid. “Nothing bad is going to happen. You are safe. The plane is safe. It’s just a storm.” 

As soon as he says the words, a bolt of lightning strikes one of the engines. Alarms begin to sound and the turbulence is so bad that people are vomiting and screaming and crying. 

The plane begins to plummet. It feels like that first big drop on a wooden roller coaster. Down, down, down. I hate to cry, it always feels like such a weakness, but now I let the tears flow unabashedly down my cheeks. The oxygen masks drop from the ceiling. Ben reaches over and pulls a mask over my face, tightening the straps. He secures his own mask then takes my hand again, intertwining our fingers. His grip is painfully tight, but I will allow it. At least I won’t die alone.

There is a horrible screeching noise. Metal on metal. It sounds like the plane itself is screaming out in pain. Something is burning and smoke is filling the cabin. The plane is ripping apart. I watch in horror as a large piece of the first class cabin roof rips away, taking several rows of seats with it. The wind whips my hair and the rain in my face blinds me. I squeeze my eyes shut and brace myself for pain. I’m sure it hurts to die. I hope it’s quick. 

I open my eyes and turn to Ben. The last thing I remember is looking into Ben Solo’s eyes. His oxygen mask is gone. The wind must have pulled it off of him. He smiles at me, his eyes full of unshed tears. I squeeze his hand and he squeezes back. Then there was darkness.

\---

This time, I awaken in the fucking water and I can’t swim. Something is pulling me along, or maybe pushing. Am I riding the current? I open my eyes to the sight of a part of the airplane wreckage sinking slowly into the ocean. A figure has an arm wrapped around my waist and he’s clinging to one of the floating seat cushions. I start to panic, kicking my legs and almost cause us to go under, cushion and all. The rain is still falling, obscuring my vision. The man grabs my arm and thrusts the cushion in my direction. He pulls us slowly toward the shore using strong, confident strokes. He must be an Olympic athlete. When we get to the point where the water is shallow enough to stand, I realize my right leg is injured. I think it’s probably my knee. 

I stumble and the man reaches for me, to pull me toward the beach. Debris and luggage are floating all around us. There are no other survivors in sight, and thankfully there are no corpses.

I look up into the man’s face with a grateful smile. It’s Ben Solo. I sigh in relief. At least I’m with someone I know and can trust. We collapse on the beach, both of us exhausted. He’s practically laying on top of me but I’m too exhausted and traumatized to push him off. His body weight on top of mine is comforting somehow. I feel safe with him.

Right now, I only know two things for certain. The plane has crashed and I am alone with Ben Solo.


	8. Chapter 8 - Day 1, again

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> An update 2 days in a row! Hooray! Thank you all for comments & Kudos.

Chapter 8 - Day 1, again

As I gradually awaken, I can feel the warmth of the tropical sun on my skin. I’m not wearing sunscreen and I usually turn red like a lobster after any time spent in the sun. I should get up and find some shade. I can already tell I’ve been here for a while because my clothes have dried out. It must be low tide. I open my eyes and find myself staring at the face of Ben Solo. He’s laying next to me in the sand, staring at me quietly.

“Hi.” I whisper and then smile.

“Hi.” He says and smiles back. “Sorry to stare at you, but you seem really familiar.” He mutters, brushing sand off his legs as he stands. He offers me his hand, which I take. As he pulls me into a standing position, I gasp and reach for my right leg before collapsing into the sand.

“Oh crap.” I mutter. “Something is definitely wrong with my right knee.” He pulls me up again and I almost collapse into him from the pain but Ben wraps an arm around my waist and steadies me. 

“Let’s move up to the shade and I'll take a look at your knee.” We hobble about twenty feet up to a shady spot under some lush tropical trees. It feels about twenty degrees cooler up here, and I am grateful for the tropical breeze.

He begins a delicate prodding around my knee cap before bending my leg. I hiss in pain when he straightens my leg out. “I have absolutely zero medical knowledge, but I think you have sprained your knee.” He looks up into my eyes for confirmation. 

“I think you’re right. I sprained this knee once back in high school. It feels like it did back then. I’ll be OK if I just wrap it tightly with something.” I smile at him and then my eyes drift down to his left bicep which looks like a velociraptor has clawed him. “Holy shit, your arm!” I can’t believe I didn’t notice it sooner. Guilt washes over me. I am so selfish sometimes. 

He shifts slightly, as if trying to hide the wound from me. “It’s not that bad, really. Just a few scratches.” 

I spring forward and pry apart the sleeve of his button down shirt, which had been shredded. There are three deep gashes cutting across his bicep. The bleeding has stopped and I don’t think he needs stitches, not that we have medical supplies for stitches. How is he not in total agony right now? And how the heck did he manage to swim that far, dragging me behind him in the water with that injury? Suddenly my knee seems so trivial.

“I think we should rinse it off in the salt water and bandage it. I remember reading somewhere that salt water helps with wounds. Prevents infections or something? Maybe we can find something to wrap it with in one of the suitcases?” I stand up and start hobbling back toward the beach. Ben grabs my arm and spins me around.

“You sit here. I will bring the suitcases up here into the shade.” He points to my knee. “I don’t want you walking around until we wrap your knee.” 

I open my mouth to protest but decide against it. As Ben turns and walks back to the beach, I sink back into the sand and look up at the sky. I notice that I’m sitting under a banana tree. At least we won’t starve to death. . . for a while anyway. 

Ben manages to find six suitcases and two large pieces of metal from the plane. He drags everything up to our makeshift camp under the banana trees. “I figure these might come in handy if we have to build a shelter.” A shelter?  _ Oh shit _ . How long does he think we are going to be here? Surely someone is looking for us already. The second the plane disappeared off radar, someone would have begun a search, right? I’m afraid to discuss it with Ben. 

We start looking through the suitcases for useful items. We don’t find any medicine or bandages. Seriously, doesn’t anybody have any God damn Advil? I find a bandana in one that I wrap around Ben's arm. He clenches his jaw as I tighten it but he doesn’t complain. I don’t know what to do if his arm gets infected. I push that thought aside for now. 

Ben rips someone’s t-shirt into strips and begins winding it around my knee. His hands are very gentle. I can tell he’s worried about tying it too tight or hurting me. It’s kinda cute. 

“I thought you seemed familiar too.” I say. It’s strange that we both had the same feeling. “Have we met somewhere before? Like at a party or something?” I had given it a lot of thought on the airplane but still can’t come up with anything. 

“I don’t think so. Unless you and I had a drunken hookup at a frat party that neither of us remember. Somehow I don’t think I’d forget fucking you.” He finishes tying the bandage around my knee but his hands haven't left my leg yet. His fingers gently brush the inside of my thigh. Holy shit. We should not be doing this right now. Our friends could be dead and we need to focus on getting rescued, not rolling around in the sand. I should put a stop to this.

I laugh nervously and push my knees together. He removes his hands and takes a step back. I decide to change topics, “Where do you think we are? How close were we to Ahch-To?” 

“I can see a few islands around us. We’re probably somewhere in the Naberrie Islands, about an hour south of Ahch-To.”

My heart sinks at his revelation. The Naberrie Islands. A large chain of volcanic islands stretching over several hundred miles. There were about three hundred islands of varying sizes in the chain and none of them were inhabited due to frequent volcanic eruptions. If Ben is correct and we are in the Naberrie Island chain, then it could be a long time before any searchers find us. 

“Maybe we should look around?” I feel like sitting around waiting to be rescued might be depressing. Maybe we can find some food or other survivors if we go for a walk. 

“Yes, and we need to find some water. Maybe build a fire and see if we can signal someone on one of the other islands?” 

I agree. Small goals. Water first. We can do this. We can totally do this.

***

We wander through the middle of our small island gathering anything of use. We do not find a magical source of fresh water but we do find a ton of coconut trees. Ben assures me that he can get them open and the coconut water should keep us alive. We don’t have any tools so I wonder how he’s going to get these things open? Maybe we can bash them with a rock or something. We make several trips back to our starting point with armloads of coconuts. 

On our third trip back for coconuts, we wander a little farther into the center of the island. We’ve been going slow because of my knee and his arm. I worry that he’s getting frustrated with my slow progress, even though he doesn’t say anything. 

He’s gotten a few steps ahead of me and even though this is a small island, I am terrified that he will disappear into the foliage never to be seen again. “Ben! Can we um…. I have to pee.” 

He stops and turns back, examining me with a blank look. He nods and stares off in the opposite direction.

“Ok then, I’m going over this way. Don’t peek.” I hobble deeper into the jungle searching for a safe place to squat. I make sure the area is snake and spider free before squatting to quickly pee. It’s tricky with my knee being bandaged, but I manage not to get it all over myself. As I stand up and pull up my hot pink undies, I notice a stone structure ahead of me. I take a few hesitant steps forward. 

“Hey Ben! Come here, I found something!” I inch closer to the structure. It looks like a stone altar surrounded in a circle by round pillars of stone. It kind of reminds me of Stonehenge or something out of this video game I used to be obsessed with called Skyrim. It’s obviously been here for a while. The stones are cracked and worn, covered in various jungle vines and moss. I stop just outside of it. Something is telling me not to enter the circle. It’s probably just my anxiety.

Ben emerges from the jungle and stops when he sees the structure. His eyes widen as he takes it all in. He slowly walks toward the altar. I grab his hand and hold him back.

“Wait. I’ve got a bad feeling about this.” 

He gives my hand a reassuring squeeze. “It’s Ok. This place has been abandoned for probably a thousand years. Let’s check it out.” He pulls me forward and we step into the stone circle.

As soon as both of my feet hit the stone inside the circle, I am blinded by a flash of light. I look over to the altar and my mouth is frozen in a silent scream. A naked woman lays on the altar, her arms and legs tied. There are strange symbols painted all over her body. She is thrashing around in terror. Above her is a figure cloaked in black robes. His face is obscured by a hood. He holds a long jagged dagger with a red blade. It almost looks like it’s glowing. He raises the dagger high above his head and then swings downward to plunge the blade into the woman’s chest. Her body spasms and then goes still, her head falling to the side. I look at her face. I look at her face and recognize my own.

I scream. Ben is standing in front of me, shaking me. “Rey? What’s wrong?”

“The people. Did you see it? Over there.” I point to the altar. He gives me a strange look and doesn’t answer. He didn’t see it?  _ He didn’t see it _ . He looks over to where I am pointing.

“What’s that?” He lets go of my shoulders and walks over to the altar. Sitting on the stone is the dagger. He reaches down to grab it.

_ Don’t let him get the dagger. _   
  
“No!” I cry. Something is wrong here. Something is very very wrong here. We need to get away from here. Now.

_ Don’t let him get the dagger. _

“Rey, this dagger might come in handy. I could use it for the coconuts or to scale fish or something. We don’t have any other tools.” 

_ Don’t let him get the dagger. _

He grabs the dagger and holds it up in front of his face, examining the blade. A chill runs down my spine.

“I think we should leave it.” I whisper. I’m trembling now and I can’t stop myself.

“We might need it. Come on, let’s get back and try and get a fire going and get these coconuts open.” He tucks the dagger into his belt and extends a hand to me. 

As we make our way back to the beach, I am too distracted to notice that my knee no longer hurts. Something keeps whispering at me and I keep ignoring it. I mean, yes he has a creepy knife and I had a creepy vision. I’ll just make sure we get off this island as soon as possible. Like before sunset. 

***

It takes us almost two hours to build a fire. Apparently neither of us are skilled survivalists. Ben blames the humidity and the fact that it was damn near impossible to find any dry firewood because of last night’s storm. We huddle around our pathetically small flames and Ben uses the dagger to try and saw open a coconut. 

“Aha!” He cries in triumph as he manages to get one open. He takes a swig before passing it over to me. I take a big gulp of the refreshing liquid and feel my spirits lifting. Ok. Maybe we won’t die out here after all. We have fire, we have water, we have shelter. Ben arranges the two pieces of metal into a little shelter to protect us from rain. I haven’t told him yet that I have no intention of spending the night on this island. I wonder if we can make a little raft and try to get to one of the bigger islands. We can see a large island with a volcano and there is smoke coming from the beach. I think it’s probably other survivors. 

_ Don’t let him get the dagger. _

That voice in my head again. The dagger looks wicked. The blade is jagged and has strange symbols carved into it. When the light hits it, I swear it appears to glow red just like that vision I saw. I need to get it away from him. I can’t explain why. I just don’t want him to have it. 

As he opens another coconut, he sets the dagger next to him in the sand. I eye it, wondering if I lunge for it, could I grab it before he does? I’m not sure. Ben has so many muscles, he’s got to be a thousand times stronger and faster than I am. Maybe my small size will help me outrun him. 

I decide that I at least need to try. If I succeed in getting the dagger away from him, things will be better. I’m not sure how I know this, but I just do.  _ Don’t let him get the dagger. _

I lunge forward and grab the dagger’s hilt and jump up. Ben looks up at me with a confused look before I see anger on his face. I bolt down the beach. 

This is not a leisurely jog or some sort of fitness-induced morning run. I’m running for my life. He’s behind me and he’s angry. I know his long legs will make quick work of the small distance between us. If I can just get to the jungle, maybe I can hide somewhere and he won’t be able to find me.  _ Just run. Keep running.  _

I have his dagger and he wants it back. I know if I let him have it then I’m dead. My hair is loose and flowing, streaming behind me like a banner as I run.  _ Just run. Keep running. _

I turn my head to look behind me and it is a costly mistake. I don’t see him and in my panic, I trip over my own feet. I stumble, and cry out, planting my hands in the sand. The dagger flies forward and lands a foot ahead of me. I reach out to grab it and in my haste, I cut my palm. The blood drips onto my dress, an ill omen. I quickly straighten myself up. It takes only a second or two, but it was precious time that I didn’t have.  _ Just run. Keep running.  _

When I’m almost to the trees, I chance another glance back. He’s not there. Where is he? Where is he? I crash into something solid. I look up into confusion at the eyes of Ben Solo, shining yellow in the afternoon sun. He crushes both of my wrists in his hands, his grip is so painful that I drop the dagger into the sand. 

He sweeps my legs out from under me and we fall to the sand. His weight is crushing me. I try to wriggle out from under him but somehow he manages to pin both of my wrists above my head with one hand. His free hand travels up my skirt. His fingers linger at the edge of my panties. Oh no. Hell no. This is not happening. We are all alone on this island and nobody will hear me if I scream. He leans forward and whispers in my ear, his hot breath makes me shiver.

“I remember everything. Every single time. I remember how tight your little cunt feels around my cock. I remember how you beg me to fuck you.”

What the fuck is he talking about? “What the fuck is wrong with you Ben? We have never fucked and I would never  _ ever _ beg you. Get off of me!” I try to maneuver my leg to knee him in the groin but it only succeeds in making me tired and him angry. 

“I’m not Ben.” 

I freeze and look at his face. He’s said this to me before. Things come back to me all at once. At least a dozen times the plane has crashed. At least a dozen times he has stabbed me. Not Ben Solo.

“Kylo Ren?” I whisper. He laughs as I remember, too late to save myself. Tears leak out of my eyes. Oh my God. He’s going to kill me - again. I’ve fucked it up - again.

“We can do this a thousand times more, and I will always win.” He whispers into my ear. 

A sharp pain erupts in my stomach. It hurts so bad I can’t fucking breathe. I look down to see the dagger sticking out of my abdomen. He did it. He actually stabbed me. Black spots form in my field of vision and then things start to fade. 

_ I thought I could trust him. I thought I could trust him. I thought- _

The airport terminal. Rose is talking to me and I have no idea what she’s saying.

Glancing down to my lap, I see a glossy brochure for our destination, Ahch-To. I run my finger over the photo of the black sandy beach on the cover. I look up at Rose with an apologetic smile. “Sorry, Rosie. I got distracted by the amazing photos in here. What were you saying?”


	9. Chapter 9 - Begin again (again)

I’m forgetting something, I know it. Great, now my anxiety is building again. I’m already terrified of flying. At least, I’m scared of the _ idea _ of flying, having never done it before. What did I forget? My passport? My ticket? I grab my bag and pry it open. My passport and ticket are sitting on top. Flight #923, first class ticket to paradise. I notice the screen of my cellphone has a missed call from Hux, Rose’s fiance. Oops. I unlock my phone and see a series of texts from him. “Hux texted. Ben’s car wouldn’t start and they are running late. They are going through security now.” 

Tucking my phone back into my bag, I look around the terminal and lock eyes with an old woman wearing thick glasses. Chills run down my spine. Do I know her? She winks at me, slow and deliberate, and then looks down to resume the knitting in her lap. I stand up and walk over to her, ignoring Rose's confused inquiry. 

“Excuse me, do I know you?” 

She stops knitting and looks up at me with a sad smile.

“Finally starting to remember?” She studies my face, which is no doubt colored in confusion. She pats the empty seat next to her. “Have a seat, Rey.”

“You know my name.” It’s not a question. And I know hers. I need to think for a minute. A voice (my own?) whispers in my ear. “And yours is . . . Maz?”

She nods. “Good. I see we are making some progress. Do you see that little boy over there?” She casually nods her head in the direction of a little blonde haired boy sitting with a middle aged brunette, presumably his mother. “The first time, the flight attendant asked if anybody would trade seats so that the boy and his mother could sit together. Nobody would trade with them. Then the plane crashed and I died and it started over again. Right back here to the waiting room. Then it happened again and I figured it was God’s way of telling me to be nicer or something. The second time I traded seats. Then the mother died, but I lived. I died later on the island. I couldn’t figure it out. Either way I keep dying and ending up back here.”

I close my eyes and see the plane crashing, the island, the ruins, the dagger. Ben plunging the dagger into me over and over and over again. “I keep dying too.”

“It’s him. After he kills you, he comes for the rest of us. You have to find a way to stop it from happening. Don’t let him near the ruins. Don’t let him get the knife. They are Sith ruins. Something evil is waiting there. He can’t resist the call to the dark. You have to keep him in the light.” 

I nod quietly, looking over to where Hux, Ben and Rose are standing. Rose has her arms crossed over her chest and she’s shooting me a hostile glare. Ben is typing away on his phone, oblivious to the activity around him.

“I’ll try.” I mutter to Maz before standing up. “If it doesn’t work, I guess I’ll see you next time.” 

“I hope not kid. Good luck.” She resumes her knitting.

“Rey, come on, it’s time to board!” Rose is waving her arms above her head.

We board the plane. I chat with Ben. We engage in some casual flirting and sip gin and tonics while watching a tacky movie. I try to be friendly. Keep him in the light. As it has every time before, the plane crashes. 

\---

This time I am awake the whole time. As soon as I find myself in the water, I cling desperately to a floating seat cushion and start dog paddling away from the sinking plane. I don’t know what happened to Ben. I don’t see him, but if things go the way they have the past few times, he will make his way to me eventually. We’ve always been on that first island together. I have no reason to worry about him surviving.

When I finally reach the shore of my familiar beach, I stumble and collapse on the sand. Should I try and go find the dagger before he can? Maybe I can hide it or throw it in the water or something? I force myself to stand, wincing at the pain in my right knee. Ugh, I forgot about the stupid knee injury. I’ll just have to push through the pain. 

I start hobbling toward the jungle when I’m halted by the sound of a deep voice calling my name.

Fuck. It’s him. He found me already. I turn and wave my arms as Ben comes jogging up the beach toward me. I notice that his arm isn’t injured this time around. Hmm. Why is he not injured if my knee is still hurting? That doesn’t seem fair.

He wraps me in a big hug, spinning me around in a circle before depositing me on the sand. I abandon my plan and decide to just play this through until I can figure out a way to save him. Just keep him in the light. That’s what Maz said, and that’s what I’m going to try to do. Keep him in the light.

I let him wrap my knee and gather suitcases, as we’ve done the prior times. He erects a shelter from debris while I sit under a coconut tree and strategize. I run through several possibilities. I get the dagger and kill him first. I get the dagger and hide or destroy it. We avoid the ruins and I don’t let him know they exist. I convince him to swim to another island without exploring this one. Maybe if I die again, I don’t even get on the fucking airplane next time. So many options. None of them seem good. 

The rain tapers off and we are both wet and shivering. Ben tries for a while to build a fire, but everything is far too wet. I allow Ben to wrap his arms around me - for warmth of course. He falls asleep first, breathing heavily into my hair. I try not to linger on the memory of how amazing his cock felt inside me from the cave. I remember everything now. I hope it stays that way next time. The more I can remember, the better chance I have of staying alive. At some point I doze off. 

When the sun’s rays wake us the next morning, Ben seems extra energized. We chat about all sorts of things. We talk about our jobs and college and how we each met Rose and Hux. We have yet another heated debate about the ranking of the  _ Empire of Stars _ movies. He sticks firm with 5, 4, 7, 6, 3, 8, 2, 1, 9. I’ve had these conversations before, but I still participate. He doesn’t seem to remember anything. 

Ben suggests that we explore the island to look for food and water. I’m uneasy but I agree to go. I have a feeling he will go without me if I say no. I can’t risk him finding the dagger or the ruins. 

Searching the jungle goes as it has the times before. Ben finds armloads of coconuts that we take back to our camp. When we get close to the area where I know the ruins are, I tell Ben I have to pee and wander toward the ruins. I stand back, outside the stone circle and look at the mini altar. There’s no dagger this time. Fuck. There goes my plan of hiding or destroying it. I wonder why it’s not there. Where is it? Do I have to step inside the circle for it to appear? Does it only appear for Ben? Jesus. Issues I’m not willing to deal with right now. I’m not stepping inside the circle. No fucking way.

I’ve been standing here for a while, paralyzed by my indecision. What to do? I have to head back before Ben gets worried and comes looking for me. I plaster a smile on my face and hobble back to where Ben is standing with his coconuts.

“Anything interesting over that way?” He asks nodding in the direction that I just came from.

“Nope. Just nice shady trees to pee under.” I laugh and grab a coconut from him and lead him back to our camp. He follows without any fuss at all. Maybe that’s all it takes? Just lead him away from the darkness and back to the light. 

We spend our afternoon flirting and banging coconuts on top of a sharp rock edge. It’s hard to open coconuts without the damn dagger but I’m willing to do things the hard way if it means Ben doesn’t get possessed by a Sith demon or spirit. We strategize about trying to swim to one of the other islands the next day after sunrise. Ben thinks there are other survivors and I already know there are. I almost feel bad for playing dumb, but if he can’t remember anything I’m certainly not going to tell him.

By sunset, we are both exhausted. The combination of heat and stress has us both laying next to each other in the sand, propped up to stare at the sun as it slowly dips below the horizon. Ben had managed to build a small fire. Maybe it’s the ambience, or the fact that we’ve been shamelessly flirting all day, or the fact that I remember how big and magnificent his cock is that has me pretty much ready to jump him. If you can overlook the fact that a homicidal spirit possesses him, he’s actually a decent guy. He’s fun to be with. He listens to me. He’s fucking gorgeous. 

He reaches a hand up and runs his fingers through my hair. I have a sexy beach waves thing going on due to the humidity and salt water. 

“If I have to be stranded with someone, I’m glad it’s you.” He murmurs. 

It’s the green light that I’ve been waiting for. I pounce onto his lap, wrapping my legs around his waist and pull his lips into mine. If he’s surprised, he doesn’t show it. He kisses me back with equal intensity. I grind into his lap and his hands dip down to cup my ass. His tongue finds its way into my mouth. I can feel his erection between us, hot and hard. 

I just need to keep him distracted so that he doesn’t wander off and find the dagger. This seems like an adequate, albeit selfish, distraction. Maybe if we make it out of here we can start dating or - no. Best not to think about imaginary future things that might never happen.

My fingers start working at his belt buckle. His cock springs free and I wrap my hand firmly around it. He hisses and lets out a soft curse. I lift myself up and he reaches under my skirt to pull my underwear to the side. We both moan as I slowly sink down onto him. 

His hands firmly grip my hips, but I set the pace. I rock my hips in a slow and torturous fashion. It’s different from the fast animalistic way we fucked in the cave. This is . . . something else. He peppers soft kisses along my neck and whispers over and over how amazing I feel. 

The sun is gone now, having sunk below the horizon. Ben flips us so that my back is in the sand. He lifts my legs and drapes them over his shoulders as he thrusts into me. One of his hands wraps around my thigh and his other hand seeks mine. Our fingers lock together. The change in the angle throws me over the edge. I clamp my muscles down on him and shudder through my orgasm.

He shouts my name as he comes then falls next to me in the sand. Even by the firelight, I can see that his cheeks are flushed. He has a sweet smile on his face. His finger is idly twisting through the waves in my hair.

Maybe I can be enough for him. Maybe I can keep him in the light. 

I’m always thinking such silly things. 

  
And I’m always surprised when I’m wrong.

***

I jerk awake and realize that I am alone. I miss the warmth of Ben’s body next to mine. I’m shivering uncontrollably. A nervous panic sets in. I crawl out of our shelter to look for Ben. I see him immediately and relief washes over me. He’s standing by the fire looking out over the water. 

“Ben?” I call quietly. He doesn’t respond so I take a few steps closer to him. The fire is roaring so he must have just added some wood to it. “Ben, are you OK?”

“I heard someone calling my name.” His voice is quiet. I have to strain a little to make out what he is saying. He’s still looking out over the water. I notice that he’s holding the dagger, clutching it tightly, blade pointed upward in a menacing fashion. Oh holy fuck. How did he find it?

“Where did you get that?” I ask him. He doesn’t have to answer. I already know.

“I couldn’t sleep so I went for a walk. I found it in the jungle in some stone ruins. Thought it might come in handy.” His voice is strange. Soft and airy, not the usual deep confident tone. Not Ben Solo.

I’ve fucked up again. I can’t believe it.

He takes a step towards me, his arm extended slightly, the red blade glowing in the firelight. His eyes. Fuck. His eyes are yellow. 

I scramble up and try to run. This never ends well for me. I don’t know why I bother running. He tackles me from behind and we fall to the sand. He flips me over, as if I weigh nothing at all and crushes me under his weight. I try to wriggle out from under him but somehow he manages to pin both of my wrists above my head with one hand. His other hand presses the blade of the dagger to my throat.

“Get off me Kylo.” I hiss. I try to knee him in the groin but he’s got me pinned down. 

“Aaah. So you  _ do  _ remember who I am?” He laughs menacingly, his eyes boring into my eyes.

  
“Yes, I remember. I know everything I need to know about you.” I’m angry enough to spit in his face, but decide that won’t help the situation.

“You do? Do you remember what I said last time? We can do this a thousand times more, and I will always win.” He whispers into my ear. 

A sharp pain erupts in my stomach. It hurts so bad I can’t fucking breathe. I look down to see the dagger sticking out of my abdomen. He did it. Again. He actually stabbed me. Again. Black spots form in my field of vision and then things start to fade. 

_ Don’t get on the airplane. Don’t get on the airplane. Don’t get on the airplane. _

The airport terminal. Rose is talking to me and I have no idea what she’s saying.

Glancing down to my lap, I see a glossy brochure for our destination, Ahch-To. I run my finger over the photo of the black sandy beach on the cover. I look up at Rose with an apologetic smile. “Sorry, Rosie. I got distracted by the amazing photos in here. What were you saying?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for all comments & kudos.  
> Check out my other works!  
> Completed - Ten Wise Jedi - Agatha Christie Style murder mystery  
> Completed - The Neighborhood - FBI Agents Ben & Rey. X-Files vibes  
> WIP - Hello Again, Little Rabbit - dark vampire story  
> WIP - Valley of the Dead - Historical AU with Egyptologist Ben Solo, thief Rey and a mummy!  
> WIP - You Imagine an Ocean - Pirate Ben Solo


	10. Chapter 10 - Failure is not an option

I already know what I’m going to do. This time, I’m not getting on that airplane. In fact, maybe I can keep the entire plane from taking off. Nobody dies if the plane never leaves.

I stand up and walk over to where Maz is sitting, ignoring Rose’s confused inquiry. 

“Hello again.” Maz greets me as I take the empty seat next to her. She doesn’t look up, just continues knitting.

“What if the plane never takes off? We can’t die if we don’t get on it, right?” I whisper it because I don’t want someone to overhear me.

Maz’s knitting needles stop and she looks up at me. “Well, you’ve never tried it. I suppose it can’t hurt to try. What’s one more death?” She laughs at her final question. “I always assume that I’ll still die anyway.”

“What if nothing works? What if we are dead already and this is Hell and our punishment is just to do this over and over for eternity?”   
  


“Do you really think this is Hell?” Maz asks softly. “That you deserve to be in Hell?”

“No.” I say back. “But lately my instincts have been failing me greatly.”

My gaze drifts to Rose who has her arms crossed and is shooting me a death glare. I need to go have a little chat with her before the boys arrive. I sigh and stand up. This is going to suck.

“Who was that woman?” Rose asks. 

“Oh, just someone I’ve met before. Listen Rose, I can’t get on the plane and you can’t either. It’s going to crash.”

Rose stares at me with a blank look. I’m not sure what kind of reaction I was expecting, but  _ no reaction _ is worse than anything I could have anticipated.

“Rose?” The blank look quickly turns to one of anger.

“Are you fucking kidding me right now? You are getting on that plane and it’s not going to crash. Stop being melodramatic. This is my wedding. My  _ wedding _ . Don’t do this to me.”

“Rose, please trust me. We can’t get on the plane. Something bad is going to happen.”

“Is this because you don’t like Armie? Because I love him, Rey. He’s going to be my husband. I need you to be with me.” Her eyes are filling with tears. I look around hesitantly. Hux and Ben are making their way through the crowd now. Crap. 

“Rose, please don’t get on the plane. Please stay with me. Get married here in the city.” I grab her hand and squeeze it tight.

“No, Rey. Everything is planned already. My sister is already on the island waiting for us. I don’t understand what’s going on. Why are you doing this to me?”

“What’s going on?” Hux asks as he and Ben approach. Ben is typing away on his phone, not really paying attention to the drama going on.

“Rey won’t get on the plane. She thinks it’s going to crash.”

Ben stops typing and looks up at Rey with an alarmed look.

“I don’t think it’s going to crash. I  _ know  _ it’s going to crash. Please trust me. Please don’t get on the plane.”

“Rey, you are just jealous because you have been alone for so long and you don’t have anyone like Armie. If you abandon me now, we will never be friends again.”

It’s a fair assessment. I probably am jealous of Rose and Hux. If she won’t listen to me, then I have no other choice. Failure is not an option. I have to figure this out and end things. I take a deep breath before shouting to the travelers gathered in the waiting area.

“The plane is going to crash! Don’t get on the plane. Everybody is going to die!”

People turn and stare. Maz shakes her head slowly while knitting. The boy Anakin looks scared and buries his face in his mother’s arm. Most have amused looks. They obviously think I’m a nut or a drunk or something. Nobody is taking me seriously except the flight attendant behind the counter. She picks up a telephone and I’d bet my life savings that security guards are on the way. I keep shouting with increased volume. Rose takes a step away from me, large tears running down her cheeks. I see men approaching in uniform and the flight attendant makes her way over. I don’t know if they are FBI or TSA or what, but they look pissed and I have a sinking feeling that I’m about to be arrested. 

Ben loops an arm around my waist and holds up a hand to the approaching men.

“Everything’s Ok. She’s just having a panic attack. She’s not making threats. It’s just a panic attack. She’s afraid to fly and she forgot to take her medication this morning.” Ben is using his authoritative lawyer voice. It’s sexy and awe-inspiring at the same time. 

“Are you with her, sir?” One of the men asks. 

“Fuck.” Ben mutters under his breath. I bet he regrets trying to help me now. Hux wraps his arms around Rose and steers her several feet away from us. Probably doesn’t want to get arrested along with me. I can’t blame him.

“We need the two of you to come with us, please.” He says it politely but it’s obviously an order and not a request.

The agents or guards, whatever they are, lead us away from the waiting area and down a few hallways. We end up separated into what looks like little police interrogation rooms. Why do these even exist at an airport? I don’t have a lot of time alone to myself. They send in a woman to ask me questions. I stick with the story Ben suggested - panic attack. Scare to fly. Forgot my meds. I’m in there for almost two hours before they come in and hand me my luggage and tell me that I’m free to go. I’m escorted to the exit and I can see over my shoulder that Ben is also being released. I feel bad for causing him to endure an interrogation. His face is blank but I’m sure there’s some anger there below the surface.

The plane is well on it’s way by now. Did Maz get on? Did Rose? I’m sure they did. Is the plane still going to crash? I clutch my bag tightly in my fist and step outside the airport. The busy line of taxis and buses distracts me for a second.    
  


“Rey, wait!” Ben yells. He chases me out of the airport, dragging his own bag behind him. “Wait!”

I stop in the crosswalk and turn to glare at him. 

“You don’t need to follow me. I can find my own way home. You should go back in. There’s probably a later flight you can catch.” I take a few steps away from him. Distance is safer, even though I know he can’t possibly have the dagger right now. It’s on an island somewhere far, far away. I’m going to be safe, and it only cost me my friendship with my dearest friend. 

“Rey, please don’t do this. Come back inside. We’ll get on the next flight together. Rose will be so upset if you miss her wedding.”

“Ben, seriously? I’ll probably be arrested for real if I step foot back in there. Just leave me alone. I know what I’m doing. This is better for everyone.” Someone bumps into me and I drop my bag at my feet. 

“How is destroying a friendship better for everyone?” The breeze of a passing bus whips his hair across his face. He’s so fucking sexy and I just want to tell him the truth about everything and take him home to my bed where he’d be safe. But I don’t say anything. 

I just shrug my shoulders warily and lean down to grab my bag. There’s a blaring horn and the sound of Ben screaming my name. Screeching tires. I look up to see a bus inches from me. Oh holy fu-

The airport terminal. Rose is talking to me and I have no idea what she’s saying.

\---

Back at the terminal, I walk over to Maz and tell her getting on the plane didn’t work. She nods sympathetically and encourages me to try again. 

We get on the plane and I decide that maybe I can get Ben kicked off. I flag down a flight attendant and tell her Ben was being inappropriate with me. He shoots me a hostile glare as he is removed from the plane. I almost feel bad for him. I’m sure he wouldn’t be mad if he knew I was trying to save him from demonic possession and certain death. Hux and Rose are pissed off at me too. I can’t win.

The plane crashes. I don’t survive the crash.

The airport terminal. Rose is talking to me and I have no idea what she’s saying.

\---

Back at the terminal, I walk over to Maz and tell her that getting Ben kicked off the plane didn’t work. She nods sympathetically and encourages me to try again. 

The plane crashes. We get to the island. Ben finds me. We explore. He finds the dagger. We decide to swim to the other island. While he’s distracted during the swim, I try to grab the dagger from his belt. I accidentally gash my leg and bleed into the water. A shark is attracted by the blood. I’m pulled under the water by a shark. A fucking shark. I drown.

The airport terminal. Rose is talking to me and I have no idea what she’s saying.

\---

The plane crashes. I wash up on the island again. I run to the ruins as soon as my feet hit the beach. Ben chases after me. We wrestle over the knife. He stabs me. It seems accidental. The look on his face as my vision fades looks truly remorseful. Or maybe I just want to believe that. I guess it doesn’t really matter.

The airport terminal.

\---

The plane crashes. We get to our island again, this time Anakin is there with us. Ben finds the dagger. We swim to another island. We meet up with some more survivors. Ben kills them all. Anakin and I are the only two left. I wrestle with Ben and manage to get the dagger out of his grip. I’m about to stab him with it but I hesitate. My conscience won’t let me kill anyone, even a man turned monster. He takes advantage of my hesitation, flipping me onto my back in the sand. Anakin’s screams are the last thing I hear before - 

The airport terminal.

\---

Over and over and over. I try changing little things. I try changing big things. Maz tries too. She doesn’t get on the plane and dies of a heart attack on her cab ride home. We seem to be the only two who remember. I’m wondering if my “this is Hell” theory might actually be correct. Clearly I’m missing something. No matter how many times I try to save myself, I end up dying. 

I’ll get it right, eventually.

\---

The airport terminal. Rose is talking to me and I have no idea what she’s saying, because I’m already working on my new strategy. I keep assuming that it’s all about me and Ben. Maybe I’m wrong? If it’s not about saving  _ us _ , then who? Is my own selfish desire the problem? Is there someone else I’m supposed to help?

My eyes scan the terminal. I lock eyes with the little boy, Anakin. Maz says his mother dies every time they change seats. What if I make sure that they get to sit together without anyone having to trade seats? 

I stand up and walk over to the counter, ignoring Rose’s inquiry as I walk away.

“Excuse me, Miss? I would like to pay to have those two people over there upgraded to first class seats. The boy and his mother. His name is Anakin and hers is Shmi. Their last name is Skywalker. I want you to put it on my credit card and don’t tell them it’s from me. I’d like it to be a surprise.” I slide my credit card across the counter. 

“Well, I’m not sure if there are any first class seats open and-”

“There are. Just please do it.” 

If she thinks I’m behaving oddly, she doesn’t say anything. Her fingers quickly tap the keys of her computer as she makes the changes. When she finishes, she calls the boy and his mother over to the counter and tells them that they received a complimentary upgrade to first class. The look on their faces is  _ almost  _ enough reward. The ultimate reward, of course, would be finding a way out of the time loop.

I smile to myself and walk back over to Rose. The boys are here now. I feel excited. Something about this feels right. 

I make friendly small talk with Hux and Ben as the flight attendant announces that it’s time to board the first class seats. The boy and his mother line up behind us. He has a grin from ear to ear. 

“We got upgraded to first class!” He says to me.

“That’s super cool! Have a nice flight.” I smile at Anakin and his mother. 

We board the plane and I sigh and relax in the seat. I’m not worried about myself this time and it feels like we’re about to turn a corner. Anakin and his mother are seated directly behind us. I feel a flush of embarrassment that I can’t remember if someone was behind us the last couple of times. I guess not?

Ben and I do our small talk and watch the terrible romantic comedy. When the flight attendant comes by, Ben orders a cup of coffee. That’s odd. He usually goes for booze. 

“You know what, that sounds good. I’ll have a cup of coffee too.” 

Despite the coffee, I somehow fall asleep.

\---

  
I’m jolted awake by someone gently shaking my shoulder.

  
“Rey?” 

My eyes fly open and Ben’s face is hovering close to mine. I stare into his warm brown eyes. Still on the airplane. I glance across the aisle and Rose and Hux are making out. Yuk. Anakin and his mom are peeking out the window. I turn back to Ben with a confused look.

“The captain just said we will be landing in twenty minutes. I figured you might want to see the island as we land.” He leans across my seat and lifts the flap covering my window. 

“I’m confused.” I mutter, mostly to myself.

“You slept like the dead. I don’t know how that storm didn’t wake you up. It was scary.”

Twenty minutes later, the plane lands safely on Ahch-To.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One more chapter to go! Thanks for reading, commenting & kudos.
> 
> Check out my other works!  
> Completed - Ten Wise Jedi - Agatha Christie Style murder mystery in a creepy island mansion  
> Completed - The Neighborhood - FBI Agents Ben & Rey. X-Files vibes  
> WIP - Hello Again, Little Rabbit - A dark vampire story   
> WIP - Valley of the Dead - Historical AU with Egyptologist Ben Solo, thief Rey and a mummy!  
> WIP - You Imagine an Ocean - Pirate Ben Solo


	11. Chapter 11 - Epilouge

The Varykino Beach Resort & Spa is a five star, adults only, all-inclusive dream resort tucked in a lush jungle on the black sandy beaches of Ahch-To, underneath an inactive volcano. After landing, our little wedding party boarded the airport shuttle to Varykino. I was slightly disappointed to see that none of the others from our flight were going to Varykino. The cost of the rooms was exorbitant. If Hux hadn’t been paying, I couldn’t have afforded even a basic room. Basic is a funny word. The resort is so posh that even the basic rooms were “swim out” rooms where the back door stepped right down into the large pool. I had spent an embarrassing amount of time reading about the resort online before the trip. 

From the second the airport shuttle bus pulls into the entry gate, until the second I flop down on my mattress, I am in a state of utter bliss. 

Every second that passes is confirmation of my success. I have escaped the loop, and managed to save the entire flight’s worth of people. Having done my part for the good of humanity, I am now dedicated to making Rose’s wedding memorable and enjoying all the luxuries that the resort has to offer.

Hux and Rose are ushered off to a Honeymoon villa and a meeting with their resort wedding coordinator. We are to meet at the beach this evening for a rehearsal and dinner. The wedding is tomorrow night at sunset. For the next few hours, the resort is mine to explore and enjoy. Ben and I are in adjoining rooms, and Rose’s sister Paige is across the hall. I recognize a few of Rose’s extended family and some work colleagues in the hallways. As I make my way through the lobby in search of a bar, I spy Ben chatting with some other lawyers in the lobby. 

I flash him a large toothy smile and give him a wave. His lawyer buddies all turn and stare. I look pretty good right now. I’m wearing a lacy white beach dress and strappy gold sandals. My hair is pinned up with little tendrils popping out. It’s a Bohemian look and I know the dress looks good on me. Ben waves me over. 

“Hi Rey, these are some of my work colleagues. This is David Mitaka and Mark Canady. Guys, this is Rose’s best friend, Rey. She’s the Maid of Honor.”

“Nice to meet you.” I say with a polite handshake. “I don’t want to interrupt you guys. I’m in search of the bar.”

“There are actually four bars here, including a swim-up bar in the pool .” Mitaka says. “I recommend the martini bar near the spa in the main building. Mark and I just came from there. Happy hour is going on for another hour.” 

“Thanks, I’ll check it out.” I take a step back from the group. “See you at the rehearsal, Ben.” I start to walk away and resist the urge to look back over my shoulder.

“Wait, Rey. If you don’t mind the company, I could use a drink myself.” Ben chases after me and I wait for him to catch up.

“Be gentle with him. He hasn’t been laid in a while.” Canady calls after us. Ben turns and gives his buddies a murderous look. I laugh and loop my arm through Ben’s.

“I’ll try to be gentle with him, boys. See you at the wedding.” 

A short time later, we are the only two patrons sitting at the martini bar. The bar top is made out of ice and there's a blue light underneath that gives the ice a neat glow effect. It’s some time between lunch and dinner and we are apparently the only people craving a martini at the moment. I order a Cosmopolitan. Ben orders a classic vodka martini with two olives. 

“You seem so familiar. I feel like I know you already.” He whispers. His hand reaches up and his fingers curl around a stray bit of hair that has come loose from my bun.

I laugh flirtatiously. “You haven’t even had any alcohol yet.” I wonder if he remembers, somewhere deep down. I bite nervously on my lip. Should I tell him? Will he think I’m insane? Or do I just go on pretending nothing has happened. I mean, do you tell a guy that you’ve fucked multiple times in various timelines before he kills you? Probably not. 

We make a lot of small talk and drink our way through three martinis each. At some point my hand migrates to his thigh. He’s leaning in close enough for me to smell the vodka on his breath. We hold hands and his thumb is rubbing little circles on the top of my hand. The bartender has disappeared into a back room, leaving us alone. Ben tap dances around the fact that he obviously want to fuck me. It’s cute. Finally, he finds his courage. 

“Let’s get out of here. My room or yours?” Ben asks, sliding a generous tip under his empty martini glass. 

\---

We get back to Ben’s room and he pounces on me as soon as the door is closed, pushing me up against it and pulling my dress up over my head. He doesn’t waste time. It’s like we are both hyper aware of the fact that our little tryst in paradise has an expiration date. Only six more days. He shucks my panties down and lifts my leg before thrusting into me. I don’t even know how he found the time to undo his own pants. I wrap my arms around him and let him pound me into the door. I’m too horny to be embarrassed that someone in the hallway might hear the sounds of the door rattling with each thrust. His grip on my leg is so firm that I swear I’m going to have bruises tomorrow. I don’t really mind. 

For a teeny tiny millisecond I panic when I remember that it seems more like I’m being fucked by Kylo and not Ben. No. We are safe. There is no Kylo now. I saved us and fixed the time loop. It’s Ben. Just Ben.

Afterward, we relax in his bathtub for a while and share a beer from the mini bar. We don’t talk much. We don’t need to. We already know each other. I think he knows. I think he remembers. I’m scared to ask, so I don’t.

We barely make it to the rehearsal on time. Rose notes the somewhat disheveled look to our clothing and gives me a knowing look, one eyebrow raised. I shrug and blush. She doesn’t give me any shit about it, and that’s why she is my best friend. 

The rehearsal and dinner on the beach are a blur. Ben sits across from me and devours me with his eyes. We leave together and ... well. I’m not going to lie, we spend the entire week fucking. There is some beach time and pool time and bar time mixed in, but most of the week is a booze filled sex romp. 

The morning of the wedding is spent with Rose in the spa. We get massages and facials and hair and makeup. She gushes about Hux and grills me about Ben. I keep her relaxed and happy as we sip pink champagne. 

The wedding is amazing. Rose looks like a crystal studded mermaid in her gown. Torches line the beach path to the water. The sun dips below the horizon as they exchange vows. I cry. Rose cries. Ben and I dance barefoot on the beach under the stars. 

I am so blissfully happy. 

The morning of our last full day in paradise arrives. 

“Should we do something today?” Ben asks, sliding his fingers down my spine. We are laying naked, tangled in the sheet on his bed. 

“Like what?”

“We could do one of the excursion trips to the ruins or go zip lining or something.” 

“Ruins?” My blood freezes in my veins.

“Yeah, there’s some Sith ruins on the island. It’s like a half an hour ride away. I’ve seen some before in Mustafar. They are pretty impressive. You might like them.”

“Or . . . we could stay here and swim naked in the private pool?” I suggest, sitting up and letting the sheet fall away, exposing my breasts.

We go with my plan. And it is good. 

\---

The airport terminal.

I’m relaxed. I’m happy. I’m ready to head home and begin a life as Ben Solo’s woman. It’s been a full week without any time loops so I’m certain that things have been fixed to the satisfaction of the universe. 

Hux and Rose are staying at the resort for an extra week. I see several familiar faces in the airport waiting area for our flight home. Maz gives me a friendly wink and a smile. I nod back to her but stay seated next to Ben. His arm is wrapped around me in a masculine display of ownership. I snuggle into him and rest my head on his shoulder.

Anakin and his mother sit down across from us in the waiting area. He looks happy and his cheeks are pink and sunburned. He obviously spent a lot of time outdoors this week. Anakin pulls a small sketchbook out of his backpack and begins drawing something. 

“I remember you from the flight over. Did you have a good time on your trip?” I ask Anakin, using a tone reminiscent of a kindergarten teacher.

“Oh yeah. It was awesome. We went to see the ruins and I saw all this cool stuff. Wanna see?” He flips through his book, showing us perfect sketches of various Sith ruins. “Mom let me climb to the top of one of the stone pyramids.”

I feel the blood drain from my face as he flips to a picture of the red dagger. 

“You’re quite the artist.” Ben remarks. “That’s a really cool looking dagger.”

“I wanted to keep it but my mom said no. She works at the museum in Chandrila and she studies the Sith artifacts.”

“I told Ani that he can visit the dagger at the museum when we get back.” His mother says.

“The dagger is going to the museum?” I hear my voice squeak in a very high pitched tone. I feel Ben give me a strange look.

“Yes, we recovered several artifacts this week and are transporting them to Chandrila for a new exhibit on the Sith that opens next month.” Shmi says.

“I’ll have to check it out when it opens. I live right near the museum.” Ben says. “We’ll have to make a date out of it. Right sweetie?” Ben pats my leg and my skin crawls.

I’m going to be sick. I lean forward and put my head in my hands. The dagger is going to Chandrila. Where I live. Where Ben lives. Where millions of people live. What have I done? I thought I had fixed things. I thought we were finally safe from the Sith. I thought I was saving lives. And now, the dagger will be within reach of so many people, Ben included. And I can’t undo it. I can’t go back and redo things. The time loops have stopped. 

“Rey?” Ben asks, giving my shoulder a little shake.

“What?” I ask. My voice is a whisper. A terrified whisper.

“They’re getting ready to board the first class seats. It’s time to go home.” Ben says. 

Home. We’re going home. And the dagger is coming too. 

What have I done?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all so much for reading. This has been a fun story to write. I love and appreciate all the comments & kudos. Check out my other works!


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